Chapter 21
“You don’t look good, Ali.”
“I didn’t get that from the kiss and you know that’s not a compliment, right?”
Ali was irked that he’d said such a thing. She knew that she didn’t feel very well, but he didn’t have to say it with quite so much conviction.
“No, I mean, you look like you don’t feel good.”
“I don’t.”
“What happened?”
As she talked, Cal was taking off the tattered clothes that she’d been wearing. They’d gotten snagged on branches, but she hadn’t felt it. She didn’t feel any of the scratches and bruises that she had either. Nothing was the same now. The only thing that seemed to penetrate through the numbness that apparently came with her changing into a nightwalker was the touch of Cal’s hands on her. She could certainly feel that.
He rubbed her arms, trying to get them warm. Calum forgot for a moment that she was never going to be all that warm again. He was still trying to come to grips with it, but it was not an easy thing to do. He wouldn’t have wished that for her, and now she was his mate and soon to be the mother of his children. That was a hard thing to live with.
“What do you mean? Are you talking about the bruises and scratches, because I think those were done on the way here. I can see better, but as fast as I go now, it’s hard to block all of them. I don’t even feel it. Does it look bad?”
Calum nodded his head that it did look bad. She looked like she’d been beaten up and he asked her if anything had happened with the vampires.
“Besides turning me into one of them? Well, not much I guess.”
“Then why aren’t you vibrant like they are? You look ill.”
“I don’t know. It’s most likely because I won’t feed on humans. Trenton said that was the reason, but I don’t know if I can believe him or not. He isn’t the most honest person in the world.”
“You haven’t fed yet?”
“Sort of.”
Cal was confused and wanted to know what it was that she was talking about. You either feed, or you don’t. There really isn’t a sort of in the bunch.
“How’s that?”
“Well, I’ve had the blood of animals, but not humans. So, it’s like sort of feeding because you don’t feel like you’re going to die anymore, but you don’t feel good either. It makes you feel just a little bit better. I don’t know how to describe it. It’s not enough, and my body isn’t happy with deer and cow blood, but I don’t want to kill anyone. So, as you can see, that’s why I look like this. I don’t know how it’s going to get any better.”
“Plus, you’re pregnant with my child. That’s going to take a lot out of you as well. You may very well have to feed correctly, or there is no way you’re going to be able to get through the next couple of months until he’s born.”
Ali didn’t want to think about all of that. She wasn’t sure how she was supposed to feel in either situation. All she knew was that she felt like death warmed over now and it didn’t seem to be wanting to go away. If she fed, maybe she would feel different, but then she wouldn’t be able to live with herself. It didn’t seem like much of a choice as far as Ali was concerned.
“I won’t do it, Calum. I’m not going to kill innocent people just so that I will have a little more color to my cheeks.”
“What about the baby?”
“I don’t even know if there is a baby. There is no proof. I know that you think that there is one, but where is the proof? It takes months to show, so how would you know?”
“Michael knows, and he’s always right.”
“Always?”
He nodded his head to agree. “Pretty much. That’s why everyone listens to him. That is why you’re here, and the pack hasn’t gone back into mutiny.”
“I saw the looks they were giving me.”
“You can’t worry about that. It’s going to be okay now that you’re back. We do need to get you something to eat. There are ways of getting blood without killing anyone. You know that people give it away for free.”
Ali just kind of looked at him for a moment and wondered why in the world she hadn’t thought about that. It was so simple, and she started to perk up just with the idea that she was going to be able to feel better without destroying her conscious. That was a great feeling for her to have because she was so damn hungry.
