“Is there any better place to get to than that?”
I open my mouth to tell him all the better places I can think of, but he smiles at me, knowing I can’t name any.
“That’s good,” I say, nudging him with my shoulder.
“I know,” he says, nudging me back. “I’m very pleased with myself.”
“Can we talk about something else now?” I say, suddenly feeling very drained.
“Yes,” he says, standing up, “because I’ve had my eye on these.”
He leans over the table, picking up two helmets that I recognise from the battle scene in the season three episode, “We Are All Of Blood”. Intricate snakes circle the eye holes and I’m again blown away by Dorothy’s talents.
“Put it on,” he says, putting one in his lap then holding the other over my head.
I couldn’t feel more like hiding inside a helmet right now so it’s actually the perfect thing. I nod and pull my hair out of the way, and he slides it on, the nose guard sitting over my nose. I peer through the eye holes at him.
“Oh yes,” he says, nodding at me then carefully putting his on.
We pick up swords and pretend to strike each other, then someone stops in front of our table, frowning at us over the top of their phone.
“Eliza?”
“Roxy!” I say, looking at her through one of my eye holes. “You’re back.”
“What . . . why are you . . .” she says, blinking from me to Fake McKinley, then around the room. She shakes her head and lets out a long sigh. “Please, just tell me that’s not stuck on your head.”
My heart lurches then I feel a release as Fake McKinley gently removes my helmet. Roxy smiles. Phew.
“Say goodbye to your friend. You need to get ready forthe next part of the competition. There’s some paperwork, apparently.”
“But I’m minding the stall with . . .” I say, looking round at Fake McKinley.
He beams at me, still wearing the helmet, and holds his sword out in front of him.
“I release you, Eliza,” he booms. “You may depart with Roxy.”
“You two are so weird,” says Roxy, smiling at us both with the same fondness one might have for a one-eared, incontinent dog.
CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN
JAWFAIN
(flutters around cell and lands on Viggo’s shoulder)
VIGGO RASSMUSSEN
Thank you, Jawfain. I needed that.
Vampire Falls. Season six, episode nine – “All Together Now”
“What are they calling it again?”
Roxy pulls the competition paperwork out of her backpack and frowns at it.
“Fallers Forever,” she reads. “You have to sign this waiver then give it to one of the Headset People,” says Roxy.
“Awaiver? It’s not UFC, for god’s sake.” I blink at Roxy. “It’snotUFC, is it?”
