Beth made her way into the living room. Lily’s water glass still sat on the coffee table and the blanket and pile of pillows she had been using were strewn all over the couch. She rolled her shoulders, bringing a hand to rub the back of her neck. Sheshould clean up. The thought ran through her head, but she ignored it.
A bath. That sounded like a much better use of her time. Relaxation was always the answer—something warm and comforting. Her feet guided her up the stairs and into her bedroom. She glanced at the bed, still unmade. She had always been terrible at remembering to make it. Jamie had made sure that the chore was taken care of. She pushed that thought away as she turned the taps, setting the water temperature exactly the way she liked it, adding a few drops of her favorite lavender bubble bath, watching it rise and swirl as steam curled into the air.
A thought popped into her head.
She rose from the edge of the tub, crossing the room to the linen closet behind the door where she pulled out a small box she had tucked discreetly under a stack of clean towels. Why was she, a grown-ass woman, hiding her sex toys? Equal parts embarrassment and worry that Lily might find them.
Beth pulled the toy from its packaging. She read the back of the box, touting the device as waterproof and perfect for tantalizing clit stimulation,with four attachments and twenty settings.Twenty settings? That felt excessive. Did anyone really use anything other than the one continuous vibration setting?
Reaching out, Beth twisted the tap again, cutting off the flow of water. She stepped out of her clothes, slid into the warmth of the bath, and settled in, the calming scent of lavender filling her nostrils.
The toy’s silicone was smooth against her fingers as she turned the small device over. It looked like a kidney. On one side, two discreet buttons; on the other, a suction attachment. Beth set the toy down on the edge of the tub, deciding to start with what she knew first as her right hand slipped beneath the surface of the water, grazing over her abdomen and loweruntil she found her clit, circling slowly. She tried to focus on the present moment, on the feeling her fingers were delicately drawing out, but her mind drifted to images of Jamie, her safe place. The known. But she shook her head. “Nope,” she whispered. “Not now.”
She tilted her head back, bubbles rising around her chest as she sank lower into the bath, reaching for another thought to help her on her quest to obtain her unreachable orgasm.
To her surprise, it was Sarah who came next. Not Sarah from now, but Sarah from back then. From that summer seven years ago, when everything between them was messy and raw and complicated and strangely electrifying. When they couldn’t keep their hands off each other, even long after divorce papers had been signed.
It had all started with a flat tire and a panicked phone call. Sarah had come to her rescue as she had always done. Beth inhaled sharply at the memory of Sarah, still in her clothes from court, changing her tire on a back country road. Beth’s fingers pressed insistently against her clit, remembering the way Sarah’s camisole had clung to her skin so perfectly.
She reached for the toy, fumbling with the buttons as it buzzed to life beneath the waterline. Beth exhaled at the sensation as she let herself remember more. Things like the way Sarah, when she had finished with the tire, stood, wiping her hands on a rag, her usual perfect hair tousled by the wind. Beth’s hips tilted gently in the water, legs sliding apart as she let the memory continue.
Sarah had made some joke about her being a damsel in distress. For the life of her, she couldn’t remember exactly what she said, but the comment had led to a heated roadside kiss she could still feel hot against her neck even all these years later. A moan left her lips as she increased the toy’s speed.
The kiss hadn’t been where it had stopped. No, at that point, once she and Sarah got started, there was absolutely no stopping them. And that day, Beth had been left with her palms pressed against the hot surface of her Landrover, whispering Sarah’s name over and over as she came around Sarah’s skilled fingers.
The water in the tub shifted and Beth’s hips lifted slightly, remembering exactly how that moment felt. A tingling sensation moved through her body. Her pulse quickened with excitement as that feeling intensified. She pushed the button on the toy again, increasing the speed, pressing it harder against her clit, the simultaneous sucking motion sending her senses into overdrive.
“Oh, fuck,” she whispered hoarsely, her words echoing off the quartz surfaces of her bathroom. She was so close to her orgasm, the closest she had been in months, and she wanted it. She wanted it desperately, and when she slammed her eyes shut, giving her body over to the pleasure, it was Sarah’s cocky smirk she saw as the wave of pleasure crashed over her.
She dropped the vibrator onto the ground as her heart rate slowly returned to normal. Lenore had told her to let her body surprise herself, and well, that had definitely been a surprise—both the orgasm and the memory that got her there.
Beth took a deep breath, her body sliding down, slipping under the water, because what the fuck was she supposed to do with that?
SIX
SARAH
SEPTEMBER
Sarah should have gone home.
She should have followed her gut and canceled the date Janet Starr had arranged for her. But she didn’t because Nell’s voice was still ringing in her ear:How are you going to find love if you keep coming up with ways to avoid the dates Janet sets up for you?Sarah had no answer. Nell, as infuriating as it was, had a point—Sarah was now the only thing standing between herself and her happily ever after.
At Nell’s insistence, Sarah decided to get out of her own way for once, hopping on an early flight home from her business trip. That’s how she found herself sitting in the nicest steakhouse in downtown Seattle across the table from a stern-looking woman—a hedge fund manager named Noel—with a pin-straight platinum blond bob cut on a sharp angle.
Yeah, Sarah should have canceled tonight.
She had finished her entree fifteen minutes ago and was trying her best to stay engaged with Noel. Except that task was proving harder than it should because Noel spoke only in long run-on sentences, barely giving Sarah a moment to get in a single word about herself. So far on this date, she had learned that Noel was in the middle of a divorce from her “good-for-nothing” ex-husband—Noel’s words, not hers— and that the only thing she liked more than ragging on her ex was her miniature goldendoodle, Graham.
She watched Noel speak. Watched, because if she were being honest, Sarah had stopped listening a few minutes ago. Instead, she was making her grocery list in the back of her mind while pretending to still be engaged with the story Noel was telling, but all she could focus on was the tiny piece of broccolini that had wedged itself between Noel’s front teeth.
Get broccolini, that’ll go great with the salmon.She mentally added broccolini to her grocery list as Noel kept talking at her. If Sarah were a better person, she would have found a subtle way to let Noel know about the offending vegetable vestige, but she wasn’t a better person tonight. Tonight, she wanted out of this date—the sooner the better.
After what felt like a punishingly long time, the waiter appeared. Noel made a big show of footing the bill, making a point of flashing her AMEX black card for Sarah to see. It took every ounce of self-control Sarah could muster not to roll her eyes. That self-control was tested again when exiting the restaurant, as Noel made a point to reach the door first, holding it for her with a wide grin as if no one had ever done such a simple act for her, saying, “Ladies first.” She inhaled, biting back her natural inclination to make some snippy remark. There was no need. Sarah knew one thing was sure—this would be the first and last time she would be seeing Noel.
She pulled her phone from her pocket, calling a car. Two minutes. Meanwhile, the weight of Noel’s sharp gaze pulled her attention.
“I had a lovely time tonight. You’re a wonderful dinner companion,” Noel said earnestly, giving Sarah a slow look up and down.
