As soon as the deputy left, I began to undress. I removed my shirt and sat down to untie my shoes.
“Simon.”
I closed my eyes and took a breath, pausing only a moment to center myself before returning to my task, ignoring Tony ashe sat down beside me on the bench.
“We need Sadie, Simon.” I paused again, my hands tightening on my shoelaces. I removed my shoes and set them between Tony and me. I stood up to remove my pants, unbuckling my belt.
I looked over my shoulder at Tony; his nostrils flared, and his pupils were blown as he watched me undress. “You’re such an asshole,” I told him as I dropped my pants and underwear. I stepped out of them, leaving them pooled on the floor, and walked to the shower naked.
I silently dared him to follow me, but when I looked back just before leaving the room, his head was down. His forearms rested on his legs as he stared at the floor.
Tears welled in my eyes. He would never accept himself for who he was. How did I expect him to accept me? I walked into the shower and turned on the water, letting it wash over me and wash away the grime from sitting in the cell all night waiting for my uncle Alex to decide my fate.
When I was done, I was disappointed that Tony hadn’t come in to watch me shower. I knew he wanted me as much as I wanted him, but wanting wasn’t enough. For years I had allowed him to keep me a secret. But being charged with murder, especially one you didn’t commit, had a way of making you take stock of your life.
I was worth more than being someone’s dirty little secret.
I stood beside Tony in my suit, the she-bitch at the table across from us as we waited for my uncle Alex to enter the courtroom. The bailiff had already announced him, and every passing second had me on edge until the door opened and he walked to his seat behind the bench.
“You may be seated,” he said gruffly.
As I sat down, my eyes stayed locked on him, but he didn’tlook up. When he did, he kept his gaze from mine. He looked first at the she-bitch.
“Ms. Winthrop, plead your case.”
“Thank you, Judge.” The she-bitch stepped around her table and began. “The heinous nature of this crime leaves questions as to the validity of Mr. Nelson’s claim of self-defense. Preliminary autopsy results show that the victim, Mr. Sanders, was stabbed repeatedly in the back after being knocked on the head with something heavy enough to crack his skull. Given the disappearance of the defendant’s sister, we are asking that the defendant be held without bail, Your Honor.”
“What does his sister’s whereabouts have to do with the case, Ms. Winthrop?”
“Your Honor.” She paused and looked at me. Her smile dropped, and something came over her face that I wasn’t sure I could put into words. Truth be told, I wasn’t sure I wanted to. She settled her smile in place before turning back to my uncle. “Given Mr. Nelson’s... proclivities, the state believes Mr. Nelson acted in a fit of jealous rage.”
“Objection, Your Honor,” Tony shouted as he stood from his chair.
Uncle Alex held up his hand as he glared at the she-bitch. I racked my brain trying to understand what she was insinuating. When Tony sat back down, I leaned over and whispered, “Is she trying to say that I wanted Alan?”
“No.” I waited for him to elaborate, but that was all he said.
“Please explain, Ms. Winthrop,” Uncle Alex said. “Carefully,” he warned.
“Your Honor, I would again ask that you recuse yourself given your relationship with the defendant.”
“I have a relationship with every damn resident of this town, Ms. Winthrop. Explain,” he growled.
“The state believes that, given the nature of Mr. Nelson’s lifestyle and the debauchery and degradation he is ensconced in, Mr. Nelson was jealous of the relationship between his sister, Mercedes Nelson, and the victim, Alan Sanders. We haveeyewitness testimony that proves Mr. Nelson had repeatedly asked his sister to leave Mr. Sanders, and when she refused, Mr. Nelson killed him.”
“OBJECTION!”
What?I looked between the she-bitch, Tony, and Uncle Alex, not understanding what she was implying.
“Of course I wanted her to leave Alan,” I spoke out loud.
“Simon, shut the fuck up,” Tony growled.
“Mr. Gallagher.” Uncle Alex slammed the gavel down. “I will remind you this is a court of law.”
“Yes, Your Honor. My apologies; it won’t happen again.”
Tony sat down next to me and whispered, “Simon, I need you to keep your mouth shut. Anything you say can be used against you right now. Please, if I have any hope of winning this thing, keep your damn mouth shut.”
