Two of the place settings now had shallow bowls, within which were generous portions of the steaming dessert. Both goblets had been filled to two-thirds.
“I think we’re being summoned.” Elloven clapped her hands in delight.
“Would be rude to refuse,” he agreed, then surprised himself by holding out his arm for her to take. “Join me?”
“I would love to,” she said with a gleam in her eyes, and together they approached the strange but welcoming scene.
They ate until their bowls were empty, save for some dark, delicious smears he watched her swipe with her finger and pop into her mouth. The dainty way she then slipped her gloves back on would live in his mind for a long time.
Elloven’s eyes glossed from the wine. She watched him with a slow smile, her laced fingers tracing the base of her cup as she leaned back in her chair. The dark kohl around her eyes accentuated their haunting vibrance. Her wavy hair reminded him of sunlight bathing strawberries in the early evening.
“What?” he asked. He felt himself flush.
“I was thinking of how terrible we are at talking when we’re awake.”
Jesstin tossed back more wine. He was feeling it too, a tingle in his fingers and toes. It had been a year or two since he’d done more than sip, but he hadn’t forgotten those first whispers of drunkenness. Hopefully he wouldn’t relive the morning headache as well. “That’s true.”
“You’re angry at me. I understand. I just don’t know how to find the words. Every time I try, I forget how to speak.”
“I am angry.” It wasn’t just that he couldn’t lie in the Night Soul. It was nice to have one place in the entire world where he could be exactly who he was. To say what he meant, without games. “I have a lot of anger in me, Elloven, but most of it belongs to others. Myself.”
“You’re entitled to it.”
“So are you.” He set his glass down and leaned in. “So why aren’t you?”
“Who says I’m not?” She seemed amused by the question. “Anger, when you’re powerless, is just as dangerous as fear. And it’s...” She sighed. “It can consume you, and I won’t allow it.”
He’d never thought of it that way, but who suffered the most when he was raging at the world? “Sesto told me Mathias is dead.”
“I know,” she said gently. “I don’t know what to say. I’m not sure condolences are what you need.”
A darker truth emerged. “I wish they were both dead. Castien too.”
“I’ll see to that.”
“What?”
“Sestinn and Castien.” She said it like she was speaking of some long-established truth and not premeditated assassination. He liked this side of her. It was raw and honest, two concepts he struggled with himself. “You can help, if you want, but then you’d have murder on your conscience.”
Jesstin couldn’t wipe the guilt from his expression fast enough.
But if it was transparent, she hadn’t read it.
He took another sip of wine. “I won’t deny you the pleasure, but I’ll stand at your side.”
“Will you?”
“If you’ll suffer my presence.”
“I’ll even let you have Sestinn if you want,” she said amiably. “Castien is the one I have unfinished business with.”
It was yet another way their lives were intertwined, a history older than their bond, and it all came back to brothers. One of his had hurt her greatly. Another tried to make up for it by taking care of her mother. Her brother had done something so vile, Jesstin was still cleaning up the mess left behind. The only thing worse than her finding out what Jesstin had done would be the moment she learned her brother was no different from the men who had hurt her.
“If this is real, and you’re happy to be back here, with me,” he said, “then why have you been avoiding sleeping at the same time as me?”
Elloven cupped her goblet with both hands and stared into its contents. “After what happened with those guards on the road, I couldn’t face you. I’m sorry, Jesstin. I panicked and offered Taven the only thing I could. I thought you were going to die.”
“If it had been you lying there, dying, I’d have done the same.” Truth only required truth. The degree of elaboration was optional. “And I lied to you when I said I wouldn’t have made the choice you made in Mythgarde. I would have.”
