“Why not? Then I can think of you as the brother I’ll never have.”
I’d heard it all before and did my best to ignore him as I closed the one brochure and opened the next. Since Mother died, I’d lay on her bed from time to time just to feel close, especially when I had a decision to make.
“What’s all this?”
I wanted to hide all the info pamphlets under the pillow, but knew he’d take it as a sign of weakness. Staying the course was always my best option. I opened the next brochure. “None of your business.” It was my life. I’d do what I wanted with it.
He picked up the pamphlet closest to him. “Veterinary school? Are you shitting me? You know dad wants you to go into economics and business.”
“He said no such thing.”
“If he gave you choices, then it was a test. Don’t fail it and get cut off from your inheritance. We have a family business to run, and messing around with animals isn’t going to cut it.”
“Go away,” I said, my teeth clenched. I just wanted him to leave me the hell alone for a change.
His hand snaked out, gripping me above the elbow. I gasped as he squeezed, then closed my eyes trying to will the pain away. The more it looked like it hurt, the more he enjoyed it.
And he was always careful to never mark me where others could see.
* * *
I could still feel the impression of Landon’s lips on my cheek.
Leading the way down the stairs, tension radiated off him in waves to crash against my spine. I wanted to hate him for the things he’d said to me, but couldn’t. Because he wasn’t wrong.
When we’d been together, I’d thought I knew him well, had him pegged. But since he’d found me, I’d never seen him so angry. Not even at a business deal where another company tried to royally screw him over and he told them all to go fuck themselves with a smile on his face. He always kept his temper. It was one of the reasons I’d felt safe with him.
Not for the first time, I asked myself how my life would have turned out differently if I hadn’t run to Emerson the day I’d seen the beasts transform. My brother had been the only one home, the only one I could turn to. Since my father moved MBI from Vancouver to Toronto due to some regulations when I was sixteen, we’d rarely seen him.
Maybe I would have stayed in Goldenlach Ridge if I’d kept my discovery to myself. Honestly, I didn’t know. My last year there, I had recurring nightmares of the day in the forest, ones that morphed intomegetting attacked by the bear, of my screams silenced by its great, bloody paws. I jumped at shadows and couldn’t interact with people I’d known forever. My senior year was spent with tutors at home. I hadn’t complained the day my father told us to move to the penthouse in Toronto.
My brother used my fear as a tool against me, to make me more dependent on him in place of our absentee father, who was more interested in his rapidly expanding business than his children. Emerson never hit me outright, but left small injuries to remind me of what he could do if he wanted. None of the house staff knew or cared about what was going on. The woman who was supposed to be our cook and nanny disliked Emerson, probably felt as unsafe around him as I had. He knew that and exploited it. She’d been so preoccupied with him that she’d ignored me.
Emerson always hovered, ready to swoop in and demean me if I stepped out of line—something our father never cared to correct when he was occasionally home. We’d all needed “toughening up” after Mother died.
Maybe if I’d met Landon as an adult on my own, we could have started a real relationship, one where I wasn’t lying to him every second of every day. There’d been moments where I’d allowed myself to forget what I was doing and lived in the moment. It was times like those I fell in love with Landon Urick: his drive for his business, his enthusiasm for life, his sweet and seductive nature both in and out of the bedroom.
When I’d left him, I’d known he’d be married within a couple years—he had to be, because he was that much of a catch.The perfect guy.Every time I thought of him with another woman, my heart felt like someone attacked it with a weed whacker. But even though I’d seen his name come up connected to some woman or another at special events, he’d never gotten married as far as I knew.
My chest squeezing tight, I hopped off the last stair to the ground floor. On a slow exhale, I confronted my former lover with the scarf in my hand. The look in his eyes made my heart pound. It was a mix of his earlier anger and something more poignant, a flare of memory perhaps.
The moisture in my mouth dried up. “I know you might not believe me, but I’m sorry. I never wanted to hurt you.” I don’t know if it was my imagination or wishful thinking, but I swore his granite expression softened slightly. Just as fast, it hardened once again.
“Then why did you?”
“Because at the time I didn’t think I had an alternative.” I swallowed. “This is my alternative. Right here, right now. I’m trying to correct my mistakes. It’s my top priority.” Not that he’d ever open up himself to me so I could make amends.
“And finding Walker is mine,” he said, his eyes keeping me hostage, like he could will the answers he wanted out of me.
If I knew where Walker Hayles was, I’d tell him. But I didn’t. I cleared my throat. “Please don’t tell anyone about this place. We’ve invested too much to be set back again.”
He didn’t speak for a beat, then with his intense laser-focus, said, “I’m sure if this isn’t some sort of larceny operation, you’ll tell me more.”
I shook my head, having no clue where he got his ideas, then grimaced at his expression. “It’s for your own good. Stay away from MBI. Stay away from my brother especially. Return to Vancouver and forget all about me. And don’t try to find us. Alina will probably shoot you if you do.”
“And after she patched me up so nicely,” he said in a flat voice. Then he straightened, becoming very still, his gaze on my throat.
I tensed. “What is it?”
