“I was raised by my uncle. And trust me, he never hugged me. He did tell me he loved me, but very rarely.” I offer a shrug. “Anyway, sometimes putting it into perspective helps. One day she might not be there to fuss over you, and I guarantee you’ll miss it.” I glance around the little bird hut again, inhaling a deep breath. “I get why you like it here so much. It really is peaceful. And it’s sort of a reminder, too.”
“Of what?”
I gesture to the finches, who are now happily chirping to one another as if they’re having a real conversation. “Like, if these guys can be happy even with their broken wings and other injuries, if they can keep singing, then so can we. It reminds us to not let the world take away our joy.”
A soft smile tugs on her mouth. “I like that.”
The joy of our aviary excursion stays with me during the entire walk back to the Dagger. But the moment we near the air lock, a sharp female voice cuts through the air.
“Poppy.”
My good mood fades. It’s Fiona.
“Come here,” the older woman orders, beckoning her daughter with a stiff hand.
Poppy’s posture changes, her shoulders sagging just slightly. I don’t miss the way her bare arms glint in the sunlight. She’s communicating telepathically. I bet Fiona has a lot to say about seeing us together.
Sure enough, Poppy’s eyes shutter as she turns to me. “Thanks for the plant lessons.”
She’s gone before I can say goodbye.
Hawkins is waiting for me in the Temple, where we spend about an hour harnessing gold. I’m making progress, my confidence growing after each training session. As we sit in the ethereal blue shimmer of a daggerstone alcove, I feel the energy surging inside me, a silentcurrent traveling underneath my skin. I’m learning not to force it. To just slowly gather the gold dust.
Wrap it around my hands…
Let it build, thread after thread…
Just let it grow…
Today, I even feel it humming in my torso rather than staying isolated to my hands and arms. I keep breathing, slow, steady, letting the energy pulse through my veins. For a moment, I’m tempted to incite Hawkins. I bet I could if I tried. That’s how powerful the energy is right now. But he didn’t agree to be incited, so I resist the temptation to push that boundary.
Afterward, when he announces the session is over, I don’t get up just yet. I fidget with my hands in my lap, biting my lip unhappily.
“Does it ever get to you?” I ask before he can go.
“Does what get to me?”
“Having people fear you because you can incite.”
He shrugs. “You get used to it.”
“Before I came to meet you, I was out walking with Poppy. When we got back here, Fiona practically dragged her away from me like I was a carrier for an Old Era plague. I get that Fiona hates inciters. But…I don’t know. It hurts that some people don’t trust me.”
“Of course they don’t. There’s no way for them to protect themselves from you.”
“They don’t need to,” I object.
“My advice? Stop trying to make anyone like you. Find a fucking hobby or something.”
“Is that what you do? Distract yourself with a hobby?”
It hasn’t gone unnoticed by me that he spends every single meal alone, except for the rare times Kallister eats in the mess hall. I suspect Kallister feels bad for the guy, because he always invites Hawkins to eat with him. Every time I see their veins rippling in telepathic conversation, I wonder what on earth they talk about. Hawkins is the least affable person I know.
“I suppose,” he answers. “I hike. I fly.”
“Like planes?”
He gives me a look that says,Are you a total imbecile?
