A stolen future will hurt no matter how much you move on from it.
“I hated every minute of it. We argued a lot because I couldn’t take you anywhere, and school was the only place we could talk or see each other.”
“He had eyes everywhere,” I whisper, my heart racing as bile rises in my throat at these memories. I wish we could kill Jade all over again. “I was scared.”
“I asked you out to prom, and you couldn’t hide it anymore. Your world was abusive and fragile even back then, but bearable. Once he punished you for having a relationship, it turned into a prison of your own creation.”
I open the door farther, welcoming the wind touching my skin as I gulp for air. “I don’t need a psychological evaluation, Ronan. I have a psychiatrist for that.”
And what the hell anyway? Us dating for a brief time in high school doesn’t give him any right to…well, what is this, exactly?
“It’s not a psychological evaluation. I’m trying to show you why it’s so hard for you to come clean about your relationship with Levi to your brothers.”
“How do you even know? What… Okay.” I exhale heavily, disbelief gliding through my veins at this surreal situation. “Ronan, it’s none of your business. You’re a stranger, no offense, and I’m tired of listening to countless men thinking they know better about how I should live my life.”
“Your world will shatter when you tell the truth. But it will not end. Your brothers aren’t Jade, and Levi is not me. You really think a Scott who put a claim on you publicly will ever allow anything to happen to you?”
I get out of the car, huffing in frustration because I’ve already decided to come clean anyway, but his words scrape at old wounds.
Because I never thought about it this way, but that’s part of my trauma, isn’t it?
I had a crush in high school, got punished for it, and now I’m in love.
Seems like it brings only disaster to my life.
I halt my movements, the air sticking in my throat, and I swallow hard.
Oh my God.
I’m in love. The serious kind of love. The where-have-you-been-my-whole-life kind of love.
“Lavender.” I turn around. “Love is either our greatest reward or the biggest regret. And sadly, we are the only ones who have to live with the consequences of both.”
“I hated you for a long time for inviting me to that prom,” I tell him, and despite everything, a smile twitches my mouth. “Maybe that was a blessing in disguise though. Good luck with everything, Ronan.”
Shutting the door, I rush toward the entrance where Theodore already greets me. “Miss Wright. Everyone is having dessert in the living room. You missed dinner. If you want?—”
“I’m not hungry, thank you.”
I go straight to the living room, where I see my brothers and their women engaged in a hushed conversation with Levi’s parents as they enjoy cake. The table is filled with different types, so they are probably testing the best one to choose for the wedding cake.
My heartbeat speeds up when I find Levi leaning against the wall with Wyatt, watching their families broodily.
When our eyes meet, the entire world seems to stop, leaving us alone in it, and my fingers curl as I wish to go to him and hug him tight so he’d make all the chaos in my soul go away.
Levi would know what to do.
I can’t do that, though, right? Because it’s a family dinner, and I labeled us a dirty secret.
He sets his coffee down, pushing off the wall and walking to me. “Lavender. Are you all right?” I shake my head and wave absently at Wyatt, who lifts his chin at me. “What is it?”
A single tear slides down my cheek. “I’m sorry,” I whisper.
He opened up to me in ways I couldn’t dream of, and I couldn’t even be brave enough to face all my demons.
Ronan is right. My world will crash anyway, but that won’t be the end of it.
What if I hurt his feelings in the process?
