Xander ran out the door and across the street. He let himself in using the key Immy had given him when he was helping her with her stuff. He wasn’t sure if he was supposed to use it now they had broken up but he would apologise for that later if need be. He ran up the stairs and into her lounge and saw her sitting on the sofa, her hair in a bedraggled state around her face, her trainers on her feet, neither of them done up. She looked like she’d been crying.
He knelt down in front of her, taking her hands in his. ‘What happened?’
‘I spoke to Alex and she made me realise what an idiot I was to break things off with you. I came back here to plan out what I was going to say to you to make it right and I started panicking that I’d cocked everything up and you wouldn’t take me back. The more I panicked and catastrophised, the more upset I got that I’d lost the best thing that ever happened to me. In the end I thought I would just come over and see you and hope the right words would come, but I was so upset I’ve forgotten how to tie my shoelaces and now I’vebeen crying about that for the last half an hour because this hasn’t happened for years and I hate feeling weak.’
He stroked her hand, relief coursing through him. ‘It’s not weak to ask for help. You should have called me half an hour ago.’
‘I didn’t—’
‘If you say you didn’t want to be a burden, I’ll shave off your eyebrows.’
She let out a little laugh through the tears. ‘I was going to say, I didn’t want to call you because I was too embarrassed.’
‘You don’t need to be embarrassed about this, we all struggle sometimes. Now, do you want me to tie your laces for you or show you how to do it?’
‘Can you just do it for me please? It will come back to me once I calm down. You might have to tie my hair up too, as I couldn’t remember how to do that either.’
He noticed there was a hair bobble tangled up in her curls from where she had tried and failed to tie her hair up. He didn’t think it was wise to point that out.
He tied her shoelaces then stood up, carefully removed the bobble and tied her hair in a ponytail before kneeling back in front of her again. Her tears were already subsiding.
‘Just for the record, there was not a chance in hell I wouldn’t have taken you back,’ Xander said. ‘I’ve been over there all day trying to work out how to fix it. You could have come over and said hello and I would have been yours.’
She smiled, tears filling her eyes again. ‘I’m so so sorry.’
He shook his head. ‘You were trying to do the right thing for Etta and I have to respect that. But if we’re together we have to make decisions together and you also have to trust that I know Etta better than you so most of the time I can make an informed decision about what’s best for her. Sometimes I get it wrong, I make mistakes, but I’m pretty damn sure that having you in her life will not be one of them. Case in point, she has been sad all day because she didn’t want you to leave and because she missed you. Kids are fickle creatures.’
‘Really, she said that?’ Immy sniffed.
‘Once we’re done here, I’ll take you over there and I guarantee you she’ll be over the moon to see you.’
‘So all this heartache was for nothing?’
‘Yeah, sort of. I mean, I can’t promise there won’t be more meltdowns, especially when the baby comes, but we’ll weather the storms together.’
‘I don’t want you to think that the first sign of trouble I’m going to hightail it out of there, I really thought I was doing the best thing for Etta.’
‘I know.’
‘When I realised she was so upset because of me and the baby I thought the best thing for both of you was to leave. I love you so much and I just wanted you to be happy.’
He smiled. ‘See, there’s a massive flaw in that plan.’
‘What’s that?’
‘I love you too, I have for a long time. I can’t possibly be happy without you.’
She smiled in relief and he leaned forward and kissed her, wiping the tears from her face.
‘You really love me?’ she said, resting her forehead against his and stroking his face.
‘Of course, how could I not? You’re the most amazing woman I’ve ever met.’
She kissed him, smiling against his lips.
Eventually she pulled back to look at him. ‘I think you were right, I think there was an element to all of this that was driven by not wanting to be a burden. I could see all this stress that was happening to you, with Logan, your in-laws and Etta, and I couldn’t help thinking it was all because of me and the baby. I could see your life had changed so much and I didn’t want that. I know feeling like that is something I have to work on.’
He shook his head. ‘Yes, life changed – having you live with me, a new baby on the way – but in the best possible way. Life is exhausting: being an adult; making decisions; working; having enough to pay the bills; doing my accounts, which as a small business owner I’m sure you know all about; nosy, interfering brothers; disapprovingex-in-laws; raising a child on my own and everything that entails. But you are the reward. Having you to curl up with every night, waking up with you in my arms every morning, it doesn’t get better than that. I can take anything else life throws at me because I get to be with you. So I will gladly tie your shoelaces everysingle day because love means helping you is never a burden.’
