Xander nodded. They both knew that was a lie but he wasn’t going to challenge them on it, certainly not in front of Etta. It was good for her to have some kind of grandparent relationship, even if it was a slightly rubbish one.
‘So where’sshesleeping?’ Tom nodded towards Immy who was chatting to Etta as she played with Jacob.
Xander turned back round to speak to his daughter. ‘Etta, why don’t you take Jacob and Immy and show them the tree swing in the garden.’
‘Oh yes, let me show you, you can go really high,’ Etta said, excitedly.
Immy started following them outside when a thought occurred to him.
‘And Etta, be careful with Immy, she, umm… has a bad back, so no jumping all over her.’
Etta nodded, took Immy’s hand and led her outside, Jacob trundling after them.
Xander turned back to face Margaret and Tom. ‘Immy is my girlfriend, we’ve been seeing each other for a few months.’
Although that wasn’t technically true, there was no need to go into what an idiot he’d been pushing her away when he’d been crazy about her from the start.
‘We’ve been keeping it secret from Etta but we’ll be telling her tonight.’ He chewed his lip. There was no easy way to say this so he might as well come out with it. ‘She’s also pregnant with my baby.’
They looked like they’d been slapped and he immediately wanted to take it back. Even though he hated Brook with a vengeance for the way she’d broken Etta’s heart, he didn’t want to hurt her parents. Losing Brook, despite her shortcomings, must have been heartbreaking for them. So this would be difficult for them to hear. Maybe he should have approached it more delicately.
‘It’s not even been eighteen months since Brook died and you’ve moved on already,’ Tom said, clearly angry.
‘Look, I know she was your daughter and you obviously loved her but she was sleeping with another man pretty much every day of our marriage and before we got married and then she left me and Etta to start a life with him. She didn’t love me and I’m sorry to say I never loved her. We muddled along because of Etta, because I would never have left my daughter. But despite the problems in our marriage, I was never unfaithful to her. I supported her financially so she would never have to work and she was cheating on me behind my back, stuck my daughter in front of the TV so she could sleep with another man in our bed. I’m sorry to say I have no loyalty to her. Not anymore.’
This clearly angered both of them and that annoyed him. They had no right to be angry about this.
‘She was your wife,’ Margaret said, her voice shaking. ‘Maybe if you’d been a better husband, offered more than just money and stability, she wouldn’t have needed to go elsewhere for love and affection.’
He sighed. ‘You’re right that being a husband is so much more than being a provider and maybe I could have done more for her in that regard. But she made it clear very early on that she didn’t want love, affection or intimacy from me. I tried to make our marriage work, I really did, but she wasn’t interested in that at all, which isn’t a big surprise now knowing she was with another man for the entirety of our marriage. We were… friends that raised a baby together and after the first few years weweren’t even that. She resented me because she never wanted Etta.’
‘That’s not true, she loved her daughter very much,’ Margaret said.
Xander let out a hollow laugh. ‘I wish that was true. I wish her problem had only been with me, but she never wanted to do anything with Etta, never wanted to come along on days out, never wanted to come on holiday with us. And on Etta’s fifth birthday, the day she packed her bags and left, she told Etta that she hated her, that she hated being her mum and the life she had with her.’
They both stared at him in horror.
‘No she didn’t,’ Margaret said, her voice holding none of the conviction it had before.
‘I was there when she said it.’
‘Well, I’m sure she didn’t mean it,’ Tom said. ‘People say things they don’t mean in the heat of the moment and then regret it later.’
‘Are you really defending telling a five-year-old that she was hated on her fifth birthday? I know Brook was your daughter and you loved her but you can’t possibly think that’s OK.’
Neither of them had an answer to that.
Xander sighed. ‘I’m sorry if me moving on upsets you but you can’t expect me to grieve over her after what she did. I’ve been so scared of dating as I never wanted Etta to be hurt by anyone else but Immy is… special and she makes me happy. It’s very early days for us and, while the baby was not part of the plan, I’m excited about our future. And I hope, in time, you can be happy for me too.’
They were silent for a moment before Tom spoke.
‘What about Etta?’
Xander frowned in confusion. ‘What about her?’
‘You’re not going to want her around when the baby is born.’
‘Of course I will, she’ll be a brilliant big sister.’
