She looked at the sandals, lovely little strappy things with diamantes across the toes. She felt touched that he’d not only bought her all this but that he knew her style and preferences. ‘Thank you. This is all too much. Although I’m very excited about our date tonight. I haven’t been on a proper date for a very long time.’
‘We’re doing things properly. I’ll even wear a suit.’
She smiled at that. Although she wasn’t sure her heart could take the sight of him in a suit. It might just combust.
‘I also bought you some underwear as you don’t have a bra and I’m sure wearing my boxer shorts isn’t that comfy.’
She looked inside the next bag and laughed. ‘You bought me lingerie.’
He frowned in confusion. ‘What’s the difference?’
‘Have you ever been in a long-term relationship other than with your wife? I know you were married for five years but you also said you weren’t intimate with Brook during that time. Any long-term relationships prior to her?’
‘No.’
‘Oh, you’re going to be so disappointed if things work out for us. Women tend to go for comfort rather than style when it comes to underwear. On a day-to-day basis anyway. I wear boxer shorts, women’s ones, and rather plain sports bras. This is the kind of thing you wear when you want to seduce someone.’
‘Oh well, I must admit, I probably bought them because I thought you’d look hot in them. Not that I’ll be seeing you wear them for quite a while.’
She pulled out one set that was sky-blue satin, with little pink flowers decorating the edges. It came with a matching pair of tiny satin shorts. Theywerelovely and she would have no problem wearing them for him. Eventually. She loved the way he looked at her body when they made love – it made her feel like a goddess, when she was anything but.
‘I think this will go very nicely under my dress tonight.’
‘I was hoping you’d say that. And I could never be disappointed in anything you wore. If things work out and you’re here permanently, if I was lucky enough tocall you my wife, I’d feel like I won the lottery. You could wear a sack and I’d still think you were beautiful.’
She stared at him in shock, her heart thundering in her chest.
‘Am I jumping too far ahead?’ Xander said.
She reached out to stroke his face, swallowing a lump in her throat. ‘A little bit.’
‘Sorry, just pretend I never said that. But you never have to worry about what you wear with me. I always think you look amazing.’
But she didn’t want to dismiss what he’d said, pretend it never happened.
‘Don’t be sorry. I want this to work too. I really do. I’m just… cautious.’
‘Because I hurt you?’
‘That’s part of it and I do understand your reasons, you were trying to protect Etta. But if this is going to work long-term for us, then it has to be for the right reasons, not just because I’m carrying your baby.’
‘I get that. And I’m going to do everything I can to prove to you that I’m worth taking a chance on.’
She frowned. ‘You have nothing to prove to me. You just need to be yourself and then I’ll fall in love with the real you.’
‘The real me is a dick.’
‘I don’t see that at all.’
‘My wife cheated on me for five years, I was clearly not husband of the year material. Maybe I worked too hard and I wasn’t there to support her but we needed the money. I promised to look after her and the babyand that meant long hours. But clearly I wasn’t approachable either so she couldn’t talk to me about how she felt and it ended up escalating into that big explosion of pent-up rage and frustration. That should never have happened. It should never have got that far.’
‘Hang on a minute.’ Immy swivelled on the sofa so she was sitting cross-legged and facing him. ‘You can’t possibly be taking the blame for what she did. She shouted at her five-year-old daughter on her birthday and told her that she hated being her mum and hated her. That is the most despicable, vilest thing I’ve ever heard. That is one hundred percent on her. She might not have been happy with her life, but she could have walked out at any time without destroying a five-year-old’s life, without making her doubt she’s lovable for the rest of her life, without making Etta question your relationship with her too. She could have easily asked for a divorce from you at any point, or even shouted at you for every possible wrongdoing under the sun, but to do that in front of a five-year-old, to make Etta the target of her hatred, is unforgivable. That is not your fault, there is nothing you did that warranted that kind of behaviour.’
He stared at her and she saw the pain on his face.
‘You’ve been carrying this guilt ever since she left, haven’t you? Thinking this was your fault.’
‘Yes, it had to be me that drove her to that.’
