Me
He’s concerned, not pissed.
Annie Sunshine
I messed up.
Me
Auston fucked up, not you.
It takes so long for her to reply that I check my phone three times before she sends…
Annie Sunshine
Have a fun night.
But I don’t. I can’t. Not knowing she’s stuck at home like a caged animal, hiding because Auston is incapable of handling himself like a fucking man. Because he’s an idiot who wants to duck his responsibilities.
I swear when we play the Archers in three weeks’ time, our defense better fucking punish him.
More than that, I wish Annie was here, so I could make her laugh, get her out of the house for a night to enjoy herself.
I don’t even have time to pay her a visit to check in with her because tomorrow morning the Bears are flying to Brazil for one of our international games against the Las Vegas Chargers.
But I think about her all night, even as I’m superficially smiling and joking with guests, when I’m on stage auctioning off my own cardboard cutout and signed Bears’ jersey.
That’s how I get an idea to make Annie smile, as soon as I’m back from South America.
“Hey, Tamara,” I say, leaning into our head of socials after she’s takenmorevideos of me and the guys for reels, “are all these cutouts being auctioned or can I keep some?”
She raises one brow. “I won’t even ask why but yes, there’ll be spares.”
“Could you send them to my place?”
“Tanner, what are you up to?”
I shrug, smirking. “Can you?”
“I guess so.”
“You’re one in a million,” I tell her, watching her roll her eyes. She loves the showiest ponies among the Bears boys and I amnumero uno.
18
PACE – EARLY OCTOBER
Plausible Deniability
Brazil is four days of insanity. I’m sure São Paulo is an incredible city but all I see of it is the view flying in on the Bears’ plane, the city’s high rises that we stay in and give press interviews from, the populated city streets as we’re bused out to a youth football camp and to our own facilities for this international game against the Chargers.
It’s the first time I’ve been away for an international game and thought that I’d like to come back to explore a place, to travel, as a non-player.
I have another season on my contract after this one. Increasingly, I find myself wondering what life will be like without the game and who I’ll be if I’m not Number 89, starting tight end for the Bears.
We extend our unlikely winning run with another narrow victory, thanks to a pick six from our cornerback and our linemen stepping up big time to give Lamar more time in the pocket than most quarterbacks get in a season.
Unbelievably, we’re four and nothing.
