Chapter 6
Malcolm
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Stupid. Of course she’dfreak out at the thought of the emotional side of the bond. She’s so convinced that she’s this dark cloud that ruins whatever she touches, it’s her twisted sense of self-sacrifice to spare me.
I’m about two seconds away from screaming.
Scarlett rolls over, mumbling in her sleep. Biting my tongue, I stare up at the ceiling, trying to figure out the best way to approach the situation. A light explodes in the kitchen, and I mouth a litany of silent curses.
Though she hasn’t had a nightmare since we started sleeping together, everything last night must have pushed her a bit too far, her worry driving her back into that dark place. Tossing yet again, her fists clench, and though I desperately want to ease her awake, I slide from the bed. If she were to scratch me right now, when she’s already mentally berating herself and convinced she’s going to ‘ruin me’, it would only add to her woefully inaccurate narrative.
Despite the way it makes all of my instincts rage in protest, I walk out of the room, waiting until I’m in the living room and dialing the cafeteria downstairs before calling out, “Hey, gorgeous, I’m ordering breakfast and they’re out of your usual. french toast instead?”
Her sharp intake of breath as she jolts awake is a stab to the gut, but I know I made the right call when she sighs softly in relief to see that I’m not there. “Yeah, that sounds good.”
Rattling off our order when Gladys picks up, I toss my phone on the couch and make my way to the shower. Leaving the door cracked like usual, I let the water heat up while I strip. I consider it a silent invitation, but mostly it’s a subtle bid to show her that things are comfortable between us. Casually domestic, like having a conversation across rooms is no big deal. No need for additional doors when she’s closed herself off from me already.
Don’t be a whiny little bitch. Things are going well. She didn’t push me away after our conversation last night despite her flare of panic, and as far as she’s concerned, we’ve only been ‘dating’ for a little over a week. She didn’t balk when I admitted we’re technically married, more concerned about the monetary aspect because shewantsthis to be an equal relationship. Scarlett wants this too, she just doesn’t know how to let herself have it.
Stepping under the spray, I shut my eyes, taking a few seconds to get my head on straight before facing her. Everyone makes finding your fated sound so... magical. Incredibly unlikely, but if you manage it? That it’s as easy as breathing to be with them, that you fit seamlessly together. No one prepared me for things to be so hard.
No one prepared you for your parents dying either, but you managed alright.
Mentally scoffing so Scarlett doesn’t hear me, I grab the soap and start furiously scrubbing out my agitation.Because I wasn’t alone. I had-
I had Archer. Archer, with a fated mate that hated him in the beginning, and a vampire still going through nearly the same thing that Scarlett is. It’s not about speeding everything up to rush to the happily ever after, it’s about everything that happensbeforethe end. I spend so much time dreaming of a better future, laying down plan after plan, that I forget it’s not the actual end goal; living is. Maybe I’d prefer a more peaceful world to live in, but nothing’s ever going to be perfect.
I fight for everyone else’s future to be better, when I need to spend more effort on makingtodayworthwhile, because no one knows what tomorrow will bring. My mate is having troublenow.She’s suffering while I try to fix the world so that she can have a place in it again, but by the time I pull it off, it might be too late.
Finishing up, I turn off the water and reach for a towel, drying off and psyching myself up for the phone call I’m going to have to make after breakfast. I need to face facts and accept that... I can’t do this alone. I can’t fight the entire world. At least, not while my abilities are on the fritz. Once Scarlett accepts me, I’ll stand a decent shot, but until then, I’m going to have to swallow my pride and take the biggest risk of my life so that my mate stands a shot at being happy.
I’m going to have to ask for help.
***
You asked him to dothis, you can’t fire him.
Nails biting into my palms as I clench my fists behind my back, I don a casual pose so that Scarlett doesn’t pick up on my stress. The crackling along my skin, on the other hand, is impossible to hide, so I’m just ignoring it and hoping that the two of them don’t call me out on it either.
The hug that Kasen has Scarlett enveloped in has her gaze frequently flicking in my direction as she bites her bottom lip, wrinkling her nose as the burly shifter's short brown hair tickles her face when he rubs his cheek against hers. Taking a deep breath, I try to keep calm, repeating my mental mantra since this is exactly what I called the man up here to do. He’s one of the few on the security team that knows about her, but since I continue to show up to work with all of my limbs intact, their worried warnings have long since stopped. Now, they’re simply curious, not truly believing that I’m actually hiding a lucid vamp up here and desperate to set eyes on her themselves. When I called Kasen to come up to the penthouse this morning, I swear, he must have run the whole way, flipping the others behind him the bird and arriving in two minutes flat.
His excitement is simply because she’s a mystery, not because he’s interested in her.
Even as I try to convince myself, I narrow my eyes at his hand roaming over her back while he nuzzles his stupid face on the top of her head to scent mark her. His brilliantly green eyes catch mine, and to his credit, he looks down submissively. With less enthusiasm, he acts more clinical in her rub down, but when it becomes clear that it doesn’t have the same potent effect, he returns to his attempts to become her second skin with renewed vigor.
Voice clipped with irritation, I ask, “Almost done?”
Kasen brushes Scarlett’s hair from her shoulder, pressing his nose to the side of her neck like he’s about to snort a line off of her body. “Only way it could be more potent is if I-”
