“Shh, hey, it’s alright. I’m alright.” She keeps her voice soothing, her steps measured and slow.
When she takes my hand, a flash of red in my peripherals forces me to look down, see the gore coating my body. And my hands, painted with the evidence of what I did. My vision wavers, the scene in front of me replaced by the battlefield ten years ago, but it was Cai shaking me out of it then instead of Soren. It’s just as quickly replaced by a few months ago, when we had to mow down friends we’ve known all of our lives to escape the country.
“I didn’t mean to,” I whisper brokenly. “I didn’t want to.” It echoes on repeat in my head, a denial of guilt.
Her hand settles on my cheek, leaning in so that I’ll meet her eye. My hands stain her shirt and I quickly wrench them away, but she uses her free hand to capture one and thread our fingers together.
“You did what you had to do. Repeat it for me,” she coaxes.
I mimic her words numbly, not feeling them.
“My flight is safe. I’m safe. If I did nothing, my mate would have died,” she continues softly, urging me to feel the words as truth.
I repeat the words, a desperate part of me clawing up to cling to them, but with it comes all of the horror and guilt I don’t want to feel, can’t feel yet. We’re not home, we’re not safe, so I can’t break down. I have to be stronger than that; for her and my flight. I need to keep it together.
As if she can read my thoughts, Ezra adds, “And my amazing mate has enough superglue to keep us all together.”
“Because she’s benevolent like that,” I whisper.
She nods. “The best, one might even say. So she’s going to hold your hand while you finish pulling yourself together and we get out of here. Okay?”
I nod without answering, just focusing on the pressure of her hand in mine. She keeps a firm hold, gently tugging to spur me into motion. We start walking as I work through which things need to be shoved in the box in my head and which parts of me are intact enough to be out.
I walk, but there’s a disconnect between my thoughts and actions. I’m going through the motions absentmindedly while lost in thought, trying to pull myself together. Another step in the right direction, both mentally and physically, with her as my guide.
When I’m finally in a better place, one I can function in, The air is on my face, but the smoke is worse. It’s so thick I can barely see, but yet I can breathe easier.
“Where are we?”
Ezra turns to me, smiling. “There you are,” she murmurs, “I knew you’d come back to me.”
I don’t even have enough sense to be embarrassed right now. I’m sure that mortification will come later, when I have to unpack everything, but for now I just focus on shaking myself out of the fog my brain put me in. It’s like it completely shut down, blanking out anything to save me from myself. I don’t even remember walking this far, don’t know how long it’s been or what was happening around me. All I knew is my mate was beside me and we were safe; that my flight would keep us safe.
“Sanctuary,” Cai states succinctly.
I glance around, seeing barely anything. “What happened?”
Kaiden looks at me with a single raised eyebrow. “You went on a murder spree and almost took down Kahl before the big one stopped you. We handled most of the rest before we ever found you guys; we’d been looking for Ez for a while.”
I look them over, seeing the four of them looking worse for wear, but they weren’t held nearly as long as we were and don’t look like they’re fighting the after effects of any drugs. They’re sporting some nasty bruises and gouges, are filthy and covered in blood and grime, but look like they’ll live.
“There were other female dragons, right? Besides the humans?”
Kinsley and Elias look away, a pained expression on their faces. The former is the one to finally admit. “We found them not long before you guys. They,” Kinsley breaks off, looking to Kahl.
Even his stoic expression cracks. “There were two. They were used as hostages as the men escaped, but they slit their throats anyway.”
I nod sharply, swallowing. “Any idea how many got away?”
Cai’s answer is clipped. “At least a dozen.”
I survey the area again, not seeing much. I don’t want to ask about Saige and the humans, not yet. I’m already barely holding it together as it is. Assuming we came up to see if there’s anything useful left, something to give us a clue about what the ritual entailed, I start walking away from the doorway we emerged from. I wasn’t even aware of us ascending this high, so thank fuck they found a path, because I was in no shape to climb; still not, if we’re being honest.
The top of the mountain is a huge platform; a roughly hewn, imperfect semicircle beyond the rock behind us that the doorway is set in. A few steps out, the ground changes to perfectly smooth obsidian. I crouch down, running my fingers along the edge. It’s an absolutely perfect edge, and based off of the curvature, I’d bet a perfect circle.
We walk from one side to the other, but that’s it. There’s definitely no elders to guide us, no magical glowing stones to make us evolve; just a black circle inlaid in the rock.
“Think we just need to bang on it?” Ezra suggests, huffing in frustration.
