Fuck, I’m not going to make it.I glance quickly at Kahl, apologizing with my eyes.Forgive me, brother, for the many, many sins I’m about to commit.
He might not be able to actually hear my melodramatic plea, but I know he can read what directions my thoughts are taking by the look on my face after a lifetime together. He meets my tortured gaze across the room, raising an eyebrow in challenge.
He’s so sure that Saige can’t actually mean it, that she’s been conditioned after years of abuse to exchange sex for survival. With us taking care of her paired with the mentions she’s made of being broke and can’t pull her own weight, he’s convinced she’s just trying to ease her guilt. Kahl just believes that she only feels like she owes us something and doesn’t know what else to do, and is confusing that with actual desire. Or her dragon is pushing her into heat to cement the bonds between us since we aren’t mated, and that the feelings couldn’t possibly be our own. But he hasn’t swallowed down her cries while she came on his fingers, tasted her as her legs shake while she claws at the sheets.
I keep pointing out he’s doing an awful lot of deciding what she’s allowed to do, assuming he knows better than she does what she feels, and that can’t possibly go over well. Her personal history aside, nobody responds well to that sort of thing. Yet he doesn’t seem to want to listen, caught up in his delusions, and it leaves Kaid and I brawling over who gets to skip running errands with Kahl to stay home with her.
“What sort of project did you have in mind, Kins?” Kahl asks, pushing me back on topic with a pointed look.
Clearing my throat, I go back to my sketch, though my movements are less fluid and more stilted this time. “Tables.”
“Tables?” Kaiden repeats in confusion, setting aside his work as he turns sideways on his stool to face me.
“The custom, fancy sort that people pay ridiculous amounts of money for. We can make some molds so Saige can work on the tops, using resin to do a bunch of cool shit, and we can work the iron for the frames.”
Setting down my pencil, I lift my sketch pad to show them a couple of quick ideas. Not only for a basic, rectangular table with a pretty marble effect on the top, but also smaller round end tables where the base looks like a twisted tree trunk with the branches holding the top in place.
“What’s on top of the second one?” Kaiden snickers and I flip him off.
“I was in a hurry, shut up. It’s supposed to be clear with dried leaves inside. Just an example to show the possibilities.” Turning to Saige, I try to get a read on her reaction as I expand on the idea. “Because then you’d be able to make money off of selling this stuff, and it’s something you seem to enjoy, which is always the best sort of work.”
Her face softens as she pulls back, pivoting to half sit on the edge of the table and face me. “You really think people would buy something like this, though?”
The place is warm enough that she’s down to just one of Kaiden’s shirts, tied at the hip so she doesn’t drown in it, and a pair of pajama pants rolled at the waist to fit. They’re the smallest size we could get our hands on, and despite all of our attempts, tailoring isnotour forte. She looks perfectly at ease, comfortable despite not being at home, and all I want to do is pull her onto my lap. But I just grip my pencil tighter, knowing I’m flirting with a dangerous game that I’m not mentally strong enough to win right now.
“Sure,” I reply instead of doing any number of things I actually want to, forcing myself to stay seated. “Men can lie all they want, but they like lording cool shit over each other. Each piece would be unique, which makes it that much better because they’d have something no one else did and could brag. We could cash in on their pride.”
“That’s brilliant, Kins,” Kahl chimes in, offering his support. “It opens up a hell of a lot of possibilities.”
Kaiden grabs his blade, starting the wheel to sharpen it again and grumbling about how no one appreciates a good sword anymore, but doesn’t disagree that it’s a decent idea. “It could be a good influx of cash to get us through between weapons orders,” he relents.
I get it. This started out as a good way to keep our parents’ legacy alive, taking it over when they died, and it’s one of the few things that make us feel close to them. ‘Quality above all else, and you’ve only finished a project when you leave a piece of yourself in it’ was our dads’ mantra, ensuring they only sold things they were proud of. That loyalty to quality is how they built the forge’s reputation and drummed up enough repeat customers that we were able to keep our family afloat after their deaths. And it was how we kept from losing our souls, knowing most of what we sold outside of Hadeon was used in a war we were adamantly against.
The sabotaged weapons deal Donovan brought up was an exception, our sister helping us make sure that the neighboring cities did more damage to each other than us, but it was still hard. And now, by shifting to a different sort of work, we all know it might be the end of an era. Orders have slowed down to the point we’re getting worried, and it’s just adapting to the market to make a living.
Still, change is hard to swallow sometimes. But I know our parents would approve, and it could not only provide more security for our family, but it could help our mate. And that above all else makes it less nerve-racking to venture into something new, leaves me confident it’s a smart move.
Saige steps away, and maybe it’s just my imagination, but something feels off. There’s a building pressure in the back of my head, a splitting headache forming instantly.
“We could try making a couple and see if there’s any interest, no need to commit to anything just yet,” she suggests, biting her lip and tossing a nervous glance in Kaiden’s direction.
Before it spirals and gets out of hand, I point out, “He’s not upset at the idea, love.” She glances back at me like she doesn’t quite believe me and Kaiden curses, realizing how he was coming across to her and hastily trying to correct it.
“Shit, I’m sorry.” He urges her closer before grabbing her hips, tugging her to come stand between his legs as he glances up at her apologetically. “Just been feeling the stress of less work orders for a couple weeks, it’s nothing to do with you, beautiful.”
She looks down at him with concern clear on her face. “Money’s that tight?”
Kahl interjects, walking past to kiss the top of her head on his way to steal my sketch pad. “Nothing you need to worry about, love. We’re not going to be homeless, just need to drum up some more business. This isn’t the first time we’ve had a slow spell, so we’ve got a chunk of money set aside to cover a few months. And if it ever got that bad, one of us would pick up a side job for a little while to get by.”
He pointedly leaves out the fact that since Eli’s generation is the youngest group of kids, all of the elementary and half of the middle school teachers were laid off permanently and had to find work elsewhere in town, and it’s really not that big. I haven’t even seen a sign for the grocery store hiring cart pushers anymore. If things do get that bad, one of us is going to have to start commuting to the next town over, if they’re even better off.
His attention is focused on the sketches, flipping back to scan my mock ups for the client, so he misses the way her eyes flit back to her work table guiltily. I’m torn between being ticked at Kaiden for letting it slip and making her worry, and repeating our mistakes. We were so overprotective of our sister and tried to shield her from everything for as long as we could that it blew up in our faces. I don’t want to keep things from my mate, but she already has enough to deal with without adding money stresses onto her shoulders too.
“But let’s take things one day at a time. We’ll work on a couple, and if someone bites, awesome. If not, we have some cool things to take home. Not really out anything and a fun project is as good of a distraction as anything.”
“Distraction from what?” Saige asks and I open and close my mouth several times, every single reply sounding worse than the last, so I just opt for deflecting.
“Be right back, need to take a piss.”
