“Kaiden,” she sighs, voice muffled. “You scared the hell out of me.”
Keeping my movements slow so as not to startle her again, I sit on the edge of the bed. She gravitates closer on her own accord, like a moth to a flame. As soon as the thought hits me, it dredges up some long buried lessons from school that helps to ease my rising panic before it can take root. Mom and Dads were fire dragons like Ezra, and the rest of us, I imagine. They’re the only warm blooded breed of the four types, if I recall correctly. The other three are cold blooded; the guys after they have their first shift, and the females from birth. It just never really affected us so I never had to worry about the implications before.
Lying back, I sink a bit lower, leaning against the pile of pillows and settling in slowly to see if she’s going to balk at my audacity. She shuffles closer, curling up against my chest without reservation and tugging the blanket with her. I bite my tongue to keep from jumping at the shock of frigid skin as she presses against me, so cold that my mind starts racing. I regret not paying better attention in class, unsure if she could actually die from getting too cold or just gets sluggish and weak.
Fuck, it’s a miracle she survived the winter. Thank the Fates she hasn’t been having to deal with this on her own up until now too.
“God, I missed beds the most of all, I think,” she mutters sleepily, leeching off of my heat.
Tentatively, I stroke a hand over her head and down her hair. My movements are hesitant at first, but when she doesn’t lock up or flinch away, I gradually relax. She’s like a lost little omega that finally made it back to her pack and fuck if that doesn’t make me feel ten feet tall, wanting to tug her even closer.
Before long she starts to warm up, drifting back to sleep and snoring softly. With her curled against me, breathing steadily and her sweet scent surrounding me, I’m finally able to shut my eyes, sleeping deeper than I have in a long time.
***
"Sorry,” Saige mutters, starting to peel herself off of me, but I don’t budge, keeping my arm around her and holding her tightly against my side, not ready to go back to reality just yet.
“Don’t. Just-” I sigh, toying with the ends of her hair. “You don’t have to apologize all of the time. Welikehaving you here, Saige.”
Her eyelids flutter shut again. “And maybe one day I’ll be enough.”
My chest rumbles with my growl, rolling us over and pinning her beneath me. Her eyes widen with her momentary alarm and her breath hitches as she stills. I hold myself off of her, touching nowhere despite the screaming in the back of my head that I need to make her mine, make sure she never has a reason to leave us again.
I want to protect her from everything, including herself. I need her to see that we’ll never hurt her, to feel in every fibre of her being that she’s safe here. But more than any of that, she needs to believe in herself enough to know that she could fight her way free if she had to, because it’s pivotal in her accepting this. It doesn’t matter how much you trust someone, you need to trust in yourself first and foremost.
Her breathing comes steadier as I patiently wait, and her palms eventually settle on my chest. I lean down with agonizing slowness to kiss her softly, careful to hold my weight off of her. When I pull back, I meet her eyes, less frantic, but no less wild.
“Damn it, Saige. You were always enough, didn’t you get that? We’ve been nuts about you since day one. It has nothing to do with whatever they did to you, or you becoming one of us. It’s always just been...you.” She opens her mouth to protest, but I cut her off with another quick kiss before pressing on. “It didn’t matter to us that you were human or all of the problems that would cause; we would have figured something out.Youleft, beautiful, we didn’t throw you out.”
I give her a second for my words to sink in, needing her to understand. “This just makes things easier, and lord knows we could all use a little bit more simplicity in this world. But fuck, Saige.” Trailing off, I gaze into her bright eyes and wrestle against that nagging voice in the back of my mind, the one wanting me to sink my teeth into her shoulder until it’s clear to the world that she’s ours. “I love you, damn it. So you can’t leave again. You just...you can’t. We won’t survive it.”
Her gaze softens and she fists my shirt, pulling me down on top of her before rolling us so that she’s straddling my hips, looking down at me. “I’m not sorry I left.” I start to push myself up on my elbows, but she shoves me back down into the bed and damn if it doesn’t make my cock harden painfully. “I needed that time to work through some shit without dragging you down with me, and Kaiden?” She rolls her hips and my hands settle on her hips, biting the inside of my cheek.
“I don’t think I could leave even if I wanted to,” she quietly admits and the part of me that was still taut with anxiety starts to unfurl at her words. Her voice didn’t waver, the truth in her words wrapping around me until I’m forced to accept it.
“There’s this-” she wavers a hand back and forth, struggling to put whatever she’s thinking into words. “It’s like there’s someone else roaming around my head and it’s a rough adjustment. Is that what it’s like for you guys? I thought that you guysweredragons, not that there was one possessing you.”
Tension returns with a vengeance that I try to conceal, even as my brow furrows while I try to wrap my head around what she’s saying. “You’re right, that’s not what it’s like for us at all.”
She deflates and I curse, sitting up and wrapping my arms around her back, keeping her trapped on my lap. “That doesn’t mean it’s wrong, Saige. Whatever they did to you, you’re something new and unheard of. A human changing into a dragon?” I huff, shaking my head. “Bound to be different. It’s like they forced a piece of us inside of you that wasn’t meant to merge with your system, that set up shop side by side as best as it could to survive.”
Unable to stop myself, I nip at her throat; not hard enough to draw blood, but enough that the marks my teeth briefly leave behind assuage that unrelenting pressure in my system to mark her permanently. “Different, not lesser. Let’s just take this one step at a time, alright?”
She rocks against me and I groan, but ultimately climbs off of my lap before things can go any further. “You’re right. Things are going to work out, some way or another. I just need to hang on for the ride.” She grimaces at her word choice and my jaw clenches as she quickly backpedals. “Things are going to work out because we won’t stand for anything less. We deserve more, and hell, I’ll be damned if I don’t take what I’m owed.”
Exhaling slowly, I smile. When she returns it, her eyes remain sad and haunted, but more cautiously optimistic than before. She stretches, getting up for the day and scratching at the scales coating her wrists like shackles.
“Is it alright if I take a shower? Not like I have anywhere to be, but I don’t know what you guys’ plans are today and I’d rather not have to run to the basement naked if someone shows up at the door.”
My lips twist into a grimace at the very idea of leaving her here alone while we just go about our lives. Therehasto be a better way than what we were doing before; there’s just got to be. We can’t expect her to run into the panic room every time there’s a knock on the door, to live with her guard up constantly in a place we’ve sworn that she’ll be safe. The answer is on the tip of my damn tongue, but I can’t seem to articulate it no matter how much I try.
“Go ahead,” I answer flippantly instead with an easy shrug, keeping my internal debate under wraps.
She gives me a grateful smile before heading out of the room and towards the bathroom, the faint sound of running water reaching me through the walls. I drop my head back onto the mattress and try to get my raging emotions under control. After a few more minutes I drop off a change of clothes outside of the bathroom door for her before heading into the kitchen, Kins and Kahl already up and in the middle of making breakfast.
“You slept with her?” Kinsley asks, eyes wide with obvious surprise. I fill them in on her latest quirk, Kins beaming like I just made his day with the news. “So we just need to hide her a little while longer at this rate. She’s only been back a week and is already developing new symptoms, so it’s just a matter of time before she finishes evolving.” He grabs a carton of juice from the fridge, taking a long swig before putting it back.
“Slow down,” Kahl warns, crossing his arms and leaning a hip against the counter. “If we go based off of what happened with Ez, the newbloods shifted first then bit her before she could. So there’s a chance Saige won’t be able to cross that last step without us.”
