My wings retract and I curse, bracing myself for impact. I break through the water from high enough that my skin splits, blood clouding the water and tempting the beasts lurking beneath. I claw my way to the surface, sputtering and choking on salt water. The ocean stretches out for miles upon miles, literally rubbing salt in my wounds and leaving me stinging head to toe.
“So help me fates, if after all of this I just end up anticlimactically drowning, I’m going to be pissed. At least let me get eaten by a shark or something cool, maybe a giant squid. That’s not too much to ask for, right?”
Continuing to ramble to myself, I start swimming, no end in sight. If the only company I have is myself, I might as well enjoy it. The rest of the world may hate me, but I’m sick of being disgusted by my reflection. I will tell myself how amazing I am until I finally believe it, even if it takes the rest of my life, however short that may be.
I have to go back. I may not need a pack, but a flight doesn’t sound too terrible right about now, sopping wet and miserable. I’m sick of always being alone. They need to either undo whatever they did, sever ties and set me free, or finish claiming me. But I can’t live like this anymore, stuck waiting for something to change that I now realize isn’t going to happen on its own.
The Veles brothers marked me as part of their flight, and my newly hatched, inner monster is pissed that I ran away. I may have had the best of intentions, but I’m finally able to admit that I was scared.
Now I’m just wet, hurt, and pissed off. Screw the world, damn the people in it, and fuck the triplets for making me feel like I might deserve a little bit of happiness despite being a hot mess. Even after all of this time apart, I still miss their stupid faces; all kindness and consideration in a shitty world.
I hate that I love them, and hate that I’m not strong enough to fight it anymore.
Chapter 7
Kahl
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My hammer cracks down, splintering the metal and leaving me pissed off yet again. I’ve never been careless, but this last year? I’ve been a damn wreck. Every little thing irritates me in a way that I can’t suppress, no matter how hard I may try. I’m just fucking miserable ever since Saige left us, and no amount of meditation or yoga is going to change that.
I wonder if she’s even still alive.
Fuck, what if she’s dead? How could I live with myself? How would I even know?
My hammer slams down and ruins another piece, the fifth one today. I try, so goddamn hard, but it doesn’t matter. I’m angry and resentful, and my family pays the price. Despite trying to subdue my reactions, every night when I close my eyes, I see her. I suffer through her sprinting across fields, wondering if she’s going to break out in hives again with no one to watch over her while she bathes, some sick bastard deciding he could try something. I see her crawl into caves, dive into water; Iwatch, merely a spectator as the woman I love constantly suffers. Every night is a nightmare, simply because I wake up and she isn’t here.
“Kahl, why don’t you just go home?” Kaiden offers and I snarl.
“What’s the damn point, Kaid? Not like it’s any better there.”
He raises an eyebrow, but doesn’t call me out on it, not holding himself together well either. Our tempers are barely held in check these days and nothing we do seems to help. If I’m honest with myself? I know nothing will unless we get her back.
She’s part of our flight and she’s missing. She needs us, yet our dumbasses stay put in Hadeon.
A month passed before we put two and two together, realizing what we somehow did. At that point though, she was long gone and we had no way to track her. She could be anywhere, suffering or dead for all we know, and there isn’t anything we can do about it. We’re powerless and I fucking hate it. I can’t blame her for leaving, for wanting better after all she’d been through, but hell.