My mind starts wandering as the others pick up idle conversation, answering the multitude of questions she has about everything. I adore the way she seems to have an actual interest in this beyond just being polite, and I can see her becoming more comfortable the longer we’re in here. I can picture her being right at home here, Ares and Cole hovering over her the first time she gets her hands on a power tool. But not me, the one resigned to a fate of merely watching and being forced to simply be grateful I’m alive.
I can still feel the phantom pains from that night, of the blades tearing through my flesh. Three mages, ambushing me and goading me into shifting. It didn’t even take much with as high strung as I was when I got to the city, just another stark reminder that it was a fool’s errand.
The way they wrapped a chain around my neck, using their abilities to force me to the ground. Dragging me into some building and forcing me into a cage. There were several, but they made sure to jam me into the smallest one. Strike after strike through the bars, they reduced me to a bloody mess on the verge of bleeding out.
If it wasn’t for the way they began fighting between each other as I struggled not to pass out, I have no doubt I would have died there without anyone ever knowing what happened to me. But when one of the men sent a pulse of his energy at the other, throwing him back into my cage and knocking it off the table, the hinges couldn’t stand up to the force.
Adrenaline was the only thing that kept me going as I scrambled free, lashing out at the man in my haste. I broke through the small basement window, and sprinted like my ass was on fire. Only after I was several blocks away did I stop to fight with the chain, but without them yanking on it to keep it tight, I was able to slip it over my head. All I could do was run; lost, afraid, and in agony. Fuck, just so much pain. The way my muscles screamed, the scent of blood and fear so thick I was choking on it…
“Ssh, hey, it’s alright,” a voice whispers and I jolt, swiping out a claw as my lips pull back to bare my teeth.
A savage snarl rips through my throat the same time a hand clamps around my front leg, nearly knocking me off of the table I’m perched on. I blink several times, heart racing a mile a minute before horror washes over me.
I almost hurt her.
So lost in thought, I never noticed them get so close. If it wasn’t for Ares’ quick reflexes, I would have slashed into her chest. He still hasn’t let go, and that’s all that’s keeping me from sprinting from the room, absolutely disgusted with myself.
“I don’t need to be able to read your mind to know what you’re thinking,” she says softly, not stepping any closer, but not running away either.
Her heart beats quickly, but she gives no other sign of being afraid. She simply tucks part of her chestnut hair behind her ear casually, pretending nothing’s wrong.
“It’s okay to not be okay,” she declares with a sad smile. “I don’t know all of the details of what you went through, but by the shape you were in when we met, I can imagine it was pretty horrific. Even with your superior healing, something like that is bound to leave a few scars. Gods know I’m messed up, but I like to think I’m growing on you.”
She winks, shooing Ares away so she can sit beside me on the edge of the table. He steps back reluctantly, eyeing me with caution and that rips me apart in a way nothing else could. Trust is the biggest foundation of any pride, and without my family, I have nothing.
“You’re not messed up,” Cole cuts in, but she waves him away, her heart slowing to a normal rhythm now.
“Of course I am, but that’s not a bad thing. The best people are the ones that deviate from the norm. The ones that never have to go through some sort of trauma won’t understand, but I really believe it makes you a better person. You’re forced to see the world in a new light, get a glimpse of all the ugly hiding in plain sight you were oblivious to before. Survivors are forged in Hell, but it just makes them see how resilient they really are.”
She turns to me, keeping her movements easy to anticipate as she starts scratching behind my ear, trying to prove she isn’t afraid of me. “Ignoring those trials is a disservice to all you’ve endured. Wear your flaws with pride.”
Cole’s face pinches, his own struggles brought to the forefront of his mind with her words. He doesn’t speak, but just her easy acceptance is enough to help him, I’d like to think. I can’t bring myself to lean closer to her right now, because the last thing I deserve is her comfort or forgiveness.
When I don’t budge, she scoots closer instead until her thigh is brushing my side. “You were the only thing to get me through the last month,” she admits quietly. “You saw what I was like when I came back at night, covered in bruises and crying. So let me return the favor. That’s what a pride’s supposed to be, right? People you can lean on when things are hard so you don’t have to deal with them alone?”
Cole leaves the room without a word before she can see the way his eyes were starting to get glassy, torn between wanting the comfort she offers and appearing like he has everything together for her to lean on. She frowns, not understanding the war he’s having with himself and turns to Ares.
“I’m sorry. I know I came off opinionated for a hot minute there. I just got caught up in the moment, and-” Her words morph into a squeak of surprise, Ares bending down to kiss her.
One of his hands is braced between my front paws and the other beside her thigh, forcing her to lean back. Her hand darts out to clutch his shirt so she doesn’t fall backward, pulling him that much closer unintentionally. He doesn’t deepen it, just keeps it a harsh press of lips as he tries to convey everything he doesn’t know how to put into words.
Time seems to slow as I wait to see how she’ll react, not surprised at Ares pulling something like this. He’s ruled by his instincts far more than any of us, and he’s never had the best patience to begin with.
“Nothing to apologize for,” he mutters, pulling back enough that she doesn’t feel trapped. “I just didn’t know how to thank you for being the answer we didn’t even know we were searching for.”
“What do you mean?” Her voice sounds breathless, but she doesn’t seem upset.
Ares looks about two seconds away from pushing her back on the table and claiming her as ours, his pulse leaping at his throat a dead giveaway. “You just gave Cole a bigger gift than anyone has before, and gods know we’ve tried our best over the years. Yet here you are, waltzing into our lives and healing wounds we’ve long since resigned ourselves to being beyond repair.”
She swallows. “Sounds like you know how to thank me after all. Not sure why you felt you had to kiss me instead.”
“Should I be apologizing rather than thanking you, then?” he challenges, staying unnaturally still the way only a predator can.
“Nothing to apologize for,” she quotes, pulling him closer and kissing him again.
I don’t think I’ve ever missed my human body more than right now, when the desire to bury myself inside of my mate is burning through my veins. I can’t even fucking jack off right now, and though my worries of dying at the hands of mages are starting to fade, a very new fear is taking root.
Death via blue balls.
