Picking my way through the aisles, I load up on extra staples since the guys are pitching in. By the time we’re done and pay, it’s pretty close to a month’s rent. I grab several of the tote bags, since we draw a hard line against plastic around here, and the guys divvy up the rest.
“Do you really just walk everywhere?” Atlas asks, not even looking fazed at lugging around all of the extra weight.
“Not like I’ve got wings, and a horse can’t exactly fit into my apartment.”
Lucien sighs. “What a depressing way to live.”
“Oh my gosh!” I gasp in mock horror. “You’re right! I just hadn’t realized how sad and pathetic my life was until you pointed it out just now.”
Dorian glares at him. “Do you always have to be such a dick?”
The squabbling is cut off as Rickon comes around the corner with two of his soldier buddies. “Ah, the littlest Lark,” he drawls, looking down his nose at me.
I have no choice but to stop with them blocking our way and I mentally just groan, but knew a trip out with the humans could never end without some sort of confrontation by someone or something. Though I’d prefer to be mauled by a fuckin’ tiger at this point over this constant thorn in my side.
He’s wearing his perpetual sneer, marring the perfection his blonde hair and green eyes might otherwise afford him. The scar that rakes from his left eye to his lip should ruin the effect of fae beauty, but by some cosmic mishap, actually adds to his appeal. If he wasn’t suck a fucking twat, I might actually consider him attractive, but the constant degradation really dampens the appeal.
“Dickoff,” I greet cordially.
His eyes narrow as they always do at the name, yet I just can’t seem to bite my tongue where the asshole is concerned. It’s the only thing I have left, the one thing he can’t take away from me.
“For a minute there, I thought you’d skipped town with your little pets,” he jabs and my back goes ramrod straight.
“You’ve been in my apartment?” His eyes sparkle with amusement and it instantly makes me hostile and want to throw up at the same time. “You had no reason,” I spit out.
He clucks his tongue. “Of course I did. You claimed the humans and then disappeared for days. For all I knew, they dragged you back to their world to do depraved, immoral things. Or experiment on you; you know what sort of scum humans are.”
“Listen here, asshole,” Atlas snaps, but I pass him my bags to stop him before things can escalate. The last thing I want is Rickon goading them into doing something stupid and having an excuse to execute them.
I step forward with murder in my eyes. “Stay the fuck out of my apartment.”
He grins malevolently. “You forget who you are, little Lark. An attention whore like yourself doesn’t get to give me commands. You think anyone cares what happens in the slums? To the people in it?” He leans down as he sneers. “You think anyone would cry if you withered away in the human world?”
I didn’t even blink, and I still missed Lucien stepping forward to cold cock Rickon in the face. He stumbles back a step before smiling psychotically, his teeth covered in blood as if he just got the best Christmas present ever. I close my eyes for a moment, nauseous, because the guys played right into his hands. He came here looking for an excuse to fuck with me and I didn’t even consider warning them about something like this.
As Rickon moves to restrain the guys, I act on instinct. Wrapping a hand around him and one of the nameless soldier’s wrists, I inhale deeply. As they stumble, I duck before the other soldier’s backhand can strike me, stepping to the side as I rise up. Atlas grabs the wrist of the last standing soldier as he moves to punch me in my ribs this time, and I grab the soldier’s arm, breathing deeply once more. A tense moment later, he falls to the ground, unconscious.
I step back, sick to my stomach as the reality of what I just did hits me. My ears are ringing so loudly that Atlas and Lucien’s voice sound like they’re underwater, muffled and distorted. When Dorian’s fingers brush against my hand, I jerk away swiftly.
“Don’t touch me, I’m not, I can’t,” I ramble, starting to hyperventilate. I clutch my hands in a ball over my stomach, tears starting to blur my vision.
“We need to get off the street,” I vaguely hear Lucien saying.
Dorian is suddenly before me, bending down so he can see my face. “Skin to skin only?”
I nod my head rapidly, a few tears escaping and trailing down my cheeks as my breath hitches. A moment later, I’m lifted up with my face pressing against Dorian’s chest and cloth rubbing beneath the back of my knees.
Before I know it we’re back in my apartment and Dorian gently sets me down so that I’m sitting on the table with my legs hanging over the edge. I fight to get control of myself, but every time I think I make some progress, I’m assaulted by another vivid memory.
“What’s happening to her?” Atlas asks nervously.
I try to answer him, but I can’t choke the words out, barely able to focus beyond drawing in my next breath. The edges of my vision blur, darkness threatening to steal my sight and leave me alone, always alone. Silent and sightless, where I can’t hurt anybody.
“Panic attack,” Lucien answers calmly, sounding far less annoyed with me than usual.
He drags the chair in front of me, taking the sheet Dorian passes him to drape over my front and gently tucks it beneath my thighs to stay in place. It leaves only my face and neck exposed, creating a barrier between them and myself. Just that knowledge alone helps, that I won’t be able to hurt them by accident.
Over the sheet, Dorian puts his hand on my knee and starts stroking his thumb back and forth. “Everything’s alright now, beautiful. Slow, deep breaths. Nobody’s going to hurt you.”
