“Elsedora.Yes, of course I know how. It’s just…” I sighed as she tugged my arm away from my face, forcing me to look into those dazzling, multicolored irises.
She hovered over me, and her expression lacked all amusement now.
Despite my horror, the wine loosened my tongue. “It didn’twork.I wanted to—last night. I’ve always required someone to think about when I dothat,” I explained, wholly expecting her not to understand.
The hole I’d dug for my grave got deeper. Her gaze softened, and her hands hovered over me like I might need resuscitation after the breath I’d lost.
“So last night, you wanted to? When?” she questioned.
“After leaving your bedchamber. Please don’t think too much into why.” My face burned, and my heart pounded.
Her lips tugged up at the sides. “It isn’t something to be ashamed of. It’s a natural reaction—I was half dressed.”
“I shouldn’t think of you in that way,” I said. “It would muck things up. It’s crass.”
And if I had her once, even in my head, I’d want more. That part, I kept to myself.
“Lust isn’t the enemy, and it certainly isn’t crass. What if I’m perfectly willing to help you through this problem?” She sat back on her heels and continued, “It was easier when we spoke through the mirror. We were bodiless. But we have bodies, Emmerick, and sometimes they need to react. That mucks nothing up. Not with me.”
I wiped a hand down my face. “You can’t be serious, Else.”
“You would not even need to touch me. It might help quell some of the tension. You can pretend that mirror is still between us.”
She spoke so pragmatically about it all. Did what she’d proposed make sense? Was quelling this tension what I really wanted?
Sources. Some temptations should be avoided. But the wine settled in my stomach, and it slackened my inhibitions just enough for curiosity to win out.
I’d imagined what an Elsedora “private show” through that mirror would be like countless times. Now, she was here—I could touch her. But I wouldn’t.
“How would you help me?” I breathed out. My hips shifted beneath the blanket.
There was a few hands’ distance between her knee and my side. She felt too far away.
“That’s simple. I’ll tell you what to do, and you tell me what you want to see. We can stop at any point.”
“You enjoy getting a rise out of me far too much,” I said. “We really shouldn’t…”
The evocative offer she laid out clawed at my interest though.
I burned to know what she wanted me to do.
“Nothing bad will come of giving in to a few urges,” she reassured me.
“I don’t want you to think of me differently,” I admitted.Lie.I wanted her to see me as more than a tryst, but my damned body coiled like a spring, imagining her coming undone before me.
She smirked. “Pet,this doesn’t need to mean what you think it does. You are stuck with me, whether you choose to torment yourself over it or not.”
This woman was bent on turning my cheeks into a molten inferno. But I grew more intrigued.
Was I ready to play this game with her? It still seemed mad, but here we were—two people who had known each other for over two decades.
Under her expectant stare, I felt laid bare despite being fully clothed. “I don’t want to disrespect you,” I admitted. She nodded her understanding as though she might retreat. “But I won’t lie and say I don’t want whatever you’re offering me.”
She smirked. “Would it help if I told you I’ve thought of you countless times while touching myself? Does that mean I’ve sullied our friendship or done something crass to you? I did so last night.”
This time I groaned for an entirely different reason—embarrassment gave way to unbridled desire. With the last of my inhibitions thrown out the damn window, I said, “Alright. What do you want me to do?”
Clearly, we needed to settle something before I could act normally around her.
