“You put a lot of thought into this.”
“I really wanted to get it right.” He hands me an empty plate, then takes one of his own. “And I’ve been planning it for a while.”
I smile at the thought. “For how long?”
He pulls a face. “Since Roger?”
“Roger!” I bark out a laugh. “I almost forgot about him.” I pick up a sandwich and set it on my plate. “Or maybe I blocked it out.” I meet his eyes. “But Roger was my first app date. That was weeks ago.”
He scrunches his nose. “Every time you went out, I thought about how it should be me going out with you.”
“And you still took this long to admit it to me.” I shake my head, feigning disappointment.
“And to myself, honestly.” He pulls a face. “I can be pretty dense. Plus, I had some issues to figure out. It was Zoey and Ava, actually, who finally talked some sense into me.”
I go still. Because it’s a big deal to know that his daughters—and mine—approve of this. When you lose your partner and you have kids, they become the most important thing in the world. “What did they say?”
“They pointed out that I’m happiest when I’m around you,” he says. “And that you’re worth the risk. They also said their mom sucks, but that was a whole other conversation.” He laughs softly.
“I can’t wait for them to meet Amelia,” I say. “I hope they all get along.”
The corner of his mouth twitches. “I have a good feeling.” He pulls a Dr Pepper from the bag and sets it in front of me, along with a few bags of chips. “Options.”
He’s thought of everything. Covered everything.
I take a bag of potato chips and open it. “When I first moved here, it was barely spring, and on the nice days I noticed all the people out, like they’d been cooped up for months and just needed to feel the sun on their face.”
“Wewerecooped up for months,” he says. “There is nothing like sunshine after a Chicago winter. It turns fifty degrees and we’re all out here in shorts.”
I laugh. “I sort of think this whole experience of dating was like that for me. I had to go through the harsh winter of Roger and Barry and pervy old Freddy to really appreciatethis.” I look at him.
He shakes his head. “I hate the thought of you dating any of those idiots.” He leans across the table and brushes my hair away from my face, letting his hand linger on my cheek as he studies me with a quiet, burning intensity.
“Are you sure you want to do this, Miles?” I ask, because I suddenly feel like I need to give him a way out if he wants one. “We can stay friends. We’re good friends. We can still go on coffee walks and—”
“I’ve never been so sure of anything in my life,” he says, silencing me.
“I’m only bringing it up because—”
He stops me. “From the second I met you, I knew I was in trouble.” He inches closer. “I’ve been really good about keeping everyone at an arm’s length, but you? You made me want something more.” He tips my chin up and draws my gaze. “When I look at you, I imagine the rest of my life. It’s not big or flashy. It’s easygoing and peaceful. It’s long walks around our neighborhood on Saturday mornings. It’s slow cups of coffee in our bathrobes. Trying new restaurants, hanging out with our girls, maybe getting a dog? It’s all of that and everything else.”
My eyes fill with tears, and I have to blink to keep them from falling.
I take his hand in both of mine, tracing the line on his palm with my thumb. “You make me feel safe, Miles, and I didn’t know if I’d ever feel that way again.”
He closes the gap between us, pulling me close as he takes myface in his hands and kisses me softly, tenderly, like he’s memorizing every second, so I do the same. I move in closer, the warmth of his body radiating straight through mine, as I give myself over completely to the euphoria of falling in love.
Falling in love.
So. This is how that feels.
Chapter 36
We walk back to our building hand in hand, chatting quietly and basking in the glow of a perfect first date.
Miles tells me about his parents, who are happily retired and living in Florida. We swap Christmas traditions and spend a long time contemplating names for a dog we don’t have.
“I’m not naming a dog ‘Stay,’ you lunatic,” I tell him.
