I've never been at hiding my emotions, definitely not from Soph. From the corner of my eye, I see the quizzical look on her face.
“So, are you going to make me play the ‘what’s on Jackson Bennett’s mind now’ game?”
“What do you mean?”Wow, look at me being smooth and shit.
“Don’t play coy with me. It doesn't suit you.”
I take her hands in mine and look down. “I did something, and I honestly don’t know if it was the right choice, considering all my options.”
“That’s like the vaguest answerever.” Soph huffs and crosses her arms, almost like she’s protecting herself. “Give it to me straight. I can take it.”
“No. I can’t.”
“You’re freaking me out, Jax. Please, just say it.” Her eyes fill with tears, and I know I made a giant mistake. Keeping my eyes on a wall, whisper, “I paid your dad’s bills.”
Soph blinks and her jaw drops open. She gets up and turns around to head to the kitchen. I follow her and don’t say anything. She has her phone out, and her focus is solely on that. I hear the call connecting as Soph places it on speaker. An automated message says that there’s a forty-minute wait tospeak with the medical provider’s payment customer service executive.
My firecracker slams the phone to the table and turns to me fire in her eyes. “I wanted to double-check with them that I heard you right, Jax. But then I realized I must have dreamed of you saying what you just did. Because why would you even think about doing something like that behind my back?”
“You didn’t imagine it, I’m afraid.”
Soph closes her eyes and growls in frustration. “I never asked you to do that.”
“But I wanted to help. I wanted to be there for you and your family because you mean a lot to me.”
“So you thought that paying our mountain of debt would be the answer?” She almost spits her last words.
“I thought I was doing the right thing!”
“The right thing would have been to ask what I think first. We’re in a relationship. That means that we make big decisions together. Not as a surprise.”
I lean against the counter and look up at the ceiling. “Why can’t you see the reason behind my actions?”
“Don’t play the fucking victim card. You were wrong in this case. Ineverasked you to help with those bills!”
“Why didn’t you?”
“Because I wanted to care for them myself—I don’t needyouto support my family!”
Well, shit. That hurts. “Oh, so, you’re fine helping me, flying to my uncle’s funeral out of state, but I can’t do anything for you? Is that how you want to do this?”
“That’s not what I meant.”
Soph wipes the tears that are now falling, and whispers, “You should have asked first.“
“I’m sorry I didn’t. Okay?” I run a hand through my hair. “But we shouldn’t cry over the spilt milk. What do you want to do?”
“I think you should leave. We both need time to calm down. I don’t want to fight, but I’m just so fucking pissed off right now.”
I let my head fall in defeat. “Sure, I can go if that’s what you want. But I need to know that you’ll be okay once I walk out of that door.”
“I’ll call Haisley or Nelly if it gets too much—don’t worry about me.”
“But it’s my job to worry as your boyfriend!”
“And sometimes you have to give me the space I ask for.”
Grabbing my leather jacket where I had left it earlier, I walk to the door and look at Soph. She’s holding in more of her tears, and I hate myself for causing this. But I thought I did the right thing.
