Haisley:We could have made perfect dancing twins emojis
Soph:You wanted to go as an emoji??
Haisley:Why not? Now I have to go as the salsa lady emoji. I might have a red dress for it, but I have to check…
Soph:Only you my friend
After my brief conversation with Haisley, I walk to the bathroom buck naked, swaying my hips. When the cool air hits my tender nipples, my mind replays the moment when I had my ass in the air as Jax fucked me from behind, and my nipples against the sheets caused an electric feeling. I see my reflection and laugh at the state of my body—my skin is covered in marks wherever Jax bit me. He asked me if that was okay, and I told him that I wanted to be able to cover everything with a top and shorts. He listened.
As I go about doing my business, I think more about last night and now I'm sure that I want it to happen again. I know that this is a difficult time for him, and talking aboutusisn't a priority, but I'm hoping that we can discuss it sooner rather than later.
I hear the room door open, followed by something falling. Washing my hands quickly, I hurry out of the bathroom and see the mess in front of me. Jax’s head snaps up when I sigh in relief, and his body instantly relaxes at the sight of me.
“I thought you left,” my shaky voice admits.
“I was getting us breakfast,” he motions on the floor where the spilled-over coffee and a brown paper bag lie. “Why didn’t you call?”
I step closer and rest my hand on his chest, right where I can feel his heartbeat slowing. “Honestly, I figured you might have run because last night was too much.”
Jax moves his hand over mine, intertwining our fingers. “I know we’re just starting to get to know each other but trust mewhen I say this; I wouldn’t do that to you—I wouldn’t leave. Not after you’ve heard all my biggest secrets, the ones I don’t share easily.”
“I’m grateful you could share that with me.”
“Give me something after last night, so I don’t have to feel so broken next to you,” Jax looks at me, a look of anguish on his face.
Fuck. His words melt my heart. I wrap my arms around him—it soothes me to know that he didn’t leave me after all. Jax kisses my forehead, showing he’s here for me.
“My da has MS, which requires a lot of money as our insurance is a joke. And I don’t know what to do with my life—I’m second guessing every decision and struggling to accept the choices I’ve made. But I can’t just leave my family to follow my dreams. It’s like I’m stuck in a room without a door. I can’t get out,” I whisper into his shirt just loud enough that he can hear me. His hold around me tightens, and he kisses my forehead.
“The thing is that I haven’t found my place in the world. Sure, I love art and singing, but after my da’s diagnosis ten years ago, I decided that it wasn’t worth the risk to follow my dreams of becoming an artist. That’s why I stayed close to them. It’s what a good daughter does.”
Jax looks at me with understanding in the depths of his expressive eyes. “I have noticed that you care a lot about the people around you—your family, Haisley, Rose, Nelly, and the rest of our team. It was easy to tell that based on how you interacted with everyone but me from the beginning—” I laugh because he’s right, I’ve not been nice to him most of the time I have known him. “—But don’t you think it’s time to focus on yourself instead?”
“I can’t. Not right now?—“
“Why?” he asks and wipes away tears I didn’t realize were there.
“Da’s medication alone costs a lot, even with our insurance. He’s gone through some treatments that aren’t covered in our plan.” I sniffle, burrowing deeper into Jax’s embrace. “He also needs more help around the house and has almost retired from the bakery. I don’t know what my parents would do without that income. They might have to sell to someone outside the family if my sister Shannon and her husband aren’t buying it. It’s our family legacy. It’s?—”
My sobs take over, and I can’t say anything else. Jax moves his hand across my back, comforting me. “It’ll be okay, darling. I know it sounds like a fucking cliché, but life has a way of making things work, one way or another. It might not be how you planned your life, but something worthwhile will come out of this.”
I take a deep breath, a frown forming before I look up at him. “How can you be so sure after everything you’ve experienced?”
“That’s the thing, Soph. I know from experience. Think about it this way; I wouldn't have met Ollie and Eli if it wasn't for my selfish mother and her poor taste in men. Even if those events scarred me for life, I got my brothers out of it.”
“Was it all worth it?”
“Yeah, I couldn’t imagine my life without those two.”
“I’m glad that you have them, Jax.”
“I know, me too,” he says against my lips and kisses me.
His kisses are my favorite. I shouldn’t feel like this when his lips touch mine. It only means that I’m getting too deep toofast. I’m afraid that I’m repeating my past mistakes with him. But what if I can’t avoid heartbreak this time around?
“You know, we have another four hours before we have to be ready to leave for the airport. Do you wanna visit the zoo for the largest indoor desert in the world? It could be fun,” Jax suggests.
“I can come up with more ways to enjoy the rest of our time in Omaha,” I offer cheekily.
