It’s just chirping. Shitty, but not unexpected. My mistake is that I look toward Remy in that moment, to make sure that she’s still there.
Toutain smells my weakness like a shark sensing blood in the water. I know I’m going to regret that.
Things get worse in the second period. He must have said something to the rest of his team, because suddenly, they all seem to know. They found the exact bruise to keep pressing. They score again, and this time, they make it all about Remy.
“You cry after she swallowed you, too?”
“Bet she’s only with you for the paycheck, buddy!”
I do my best to lock in, but it’s too late. The rest of the team is playing an amazing game, but I’m not pulling my weight. I’m too slow, like I’m running on a delay timer. My body feels miles away from my brain. This is what happens when panic gets into your bloodstream. Everything turns sluggish except the fear.
At least, for the moment, all the action is happening on the other side of the rink. I take a deep breath and, withoutthinking, check on Remy once again. She’s moved closer to the boards to say something to Violet.
There’s no way in hell that Toutain can see the subtle movements of my eyeballs from this far away, but he’s surely noticed how many times I’ve checked on Remy over the course of the night. He’s nowhere near the puck, either. There’s no reason for him to slam into the glass right beside her other than that he’s a malicious little shit.
But he does. And I’m staring right at Remy when it happens.
And suddenly I’m twelve years old again, hearing my mother scream from the kitchen.
The impact startles her, and she flinches. Stumbles. Falls. Her headset goes flying. The rage boiling inside me tears completely loose.
I’m moving before I have time to think about what a bad idea this is. There’s not a single thought in my head other than the knowledge that Remy is in danger right now because of some reckless asshole with a huge ego. My brain stops recognizing context after that.
I remember all the times my dad went after Mom. The many times I couldn’t stop his fists. The yells from the stands and the babble of the commentators are nothing but noise.
I never seem to be able to protect my mom, but damn if I can’t make an effort to protect Remy. Maybe because failing once still feels like failing forever.
“Owen!” somebody yells. One of my teammates, probably. I don’t even slow down. I hit Toutain at full speed, tackling him to the ice.
The fight itself is a blur. I’m dimly aware of my teammates piling on. Ofhisteammates piling on. My vision is white at the edges. I’m screaming, unintelligibly at first, and then the same thing over and over. “You sick motherfucker! You can’t hurt her! I won’t let you hurt her!”
Hands grab at my arms and jersey, trying to pull me off of him. I’m too strong for them. That realization should scare me sooner than it does. I latch onto Toutain with one arm and hammer him with the other, giving the fight everything I’ve got. He needs to be punished. I need to punish him. The thought feels terrifyingly righteous in the moment.
“I won’t let you hurt her!”
“Rourke! Back the fuck up!”
“You festering taint licker!”
“Goddamn it, Owen, let go of him!”
Their pleading doesn’t stop me. The sound of my name doesn’t stop me. The thing that finally gets through is the moment when Toutain turns his head toward me. His helmet’s off. His lip is split. One of his eyes is swollen shut.
He’s bleeding. I did that. With my fists.
For one horrible second, all I can see is my father.
I freeze mid-swing. Finally, they’re able to pull me off of Toutain; I recognize Viktor’s face in my peripheral vision. All the anger from earlier drains out of me and the real world seeps back in.
The cheers and booing from the fans.
The speculation of the commentary. “—apparently without provocation. Oh, no, wait, look at this. Clovis Toutain managed to break the glass—”
Cam says, “Shit. This might be a game misconduct.”
Honestly? He’s probably being optimistic.
In front of me, Violet helps Remy off the floor behind the bench. Toutain didn’t just crack the plexiglass barrier. Heshatteredit.
