She lifts a shoulder. “You always just seemed so…I don’t know. Balanced. Smart. Not like the other guys, you know? And you’re hot as hell.” She bites her bottom lip.
I may not be like the other guys, but she’s just like the other girls. Laying compliments on me to get me into bed, pulling the bite the lip move…all of it. It’s predictable.
And it works.
Maybe it works because of its predictability.
I can’t have the one girl I want, but perhaps this one can take my mind off that fact for a little bit.
We head out to her car. As it turns out, she hasn’t had a drop of alcohol to drink. She navigates to her apartment, under a ten-minute drive from this very bar, and before we get out of the car, I say, “Are you sure you want to do this?”
She glances over at me. “It’s all I’ve wanted for the two years I’ve been cheering for the team.”
“You won’t wake up tomorrow with regrets?”
She lifts a shoulder, and she’s really very pretty. She deserves someone so much better than an emotionally unavailable football player whose mind is occupied with another woman. “Only if you’re not up to the task.”
She’s sassy, and I like that about her.
And maybe in some alternate universe, it would make sense for me to give this a try with her.
But it’s not an alternate universe, and I know exactly where my head is at. “I don’t think this is a good idea.”
She folds her arms over her chest, as if that’ll help keep her from getting vulnerable.
I stare out the windshield as she stares at me. “I’ve been in love with the same woman for the last ten years, Elena. I can’t have her, but a night with you isn’t going to change that.”
She reaches over to run a fingertip down my arm. “You won’t know that if you don’t try.”
She’s just like the rest of them. She thinks she can be the one to change me.
Nothing can change me except figuring out some way to stop doing this to myself. I ruin every potential good relationship over someone I can never have.
It’s toxic. It’s awful.
It’s not like I’m celibate.
I just had sex last weekend.
But tonight feels different. It’s the first time I’d be having sex when Tatum is single. She’s apart from my brother with no plans to get back together with him after a week or two passes. She said it’s final.
And the logical side of me knows it’s not fair to do that to some poor, unsuspecting—but horny—young woman.
I shake my head. “No, you’re right about that. The problem is that I don’t want to try.”
She presses her lips together. “Then why’d you come home with me?”
“I thought I could set my feelings aside and just have a fun time with you. But you deserve better than that.”
She leans her head back on her seat with a groan. “Why do you have to be soniceon topof being so hot?”
I chuckle. “Sorry. For what it’s worth, the right guy is out there for you. You’re gorgeous, and you seem like a hell of a good time. I’m sorry I’m not what you wanted.”
“You’re still what I want,” she says softly.
I press my lips together, and then I lean across the console and press a soft kiss to her cheek.
Then I exit the car, walk up toward the front of the apartment complex, and call an Uber to come pick me up and take me home.
