“The part where your face turned pale and you got all quiet,” he replied sharply.
“It’s nothing, I don’t feel like talking about it.” I said defensively.
“After the blood binding ceremony, I’ll be able to hear your thoughts—feel your emotions—so you might as well get used to me seeing you,” he explained.
“Ugh, just leave it alone!” I snapped. I just couldn’t go there mentally, not right now.
He let out a long breath through his nose, controlled. “Fine, but you are telling me at dinner tonight, on the balcony, it will be just us, I have a little surprise for you that I think will cheer you up.” He replied sweetly.
Something in that sweetness landed wrong. Like he could smooth everything over with a gift and a smile, like my emotions had a schedule.
“Aren’t you going to remove my fire glamour? I could use a few more bruises from falling.” It was a low blow, but I didn’t care. I was in a sour mood.
In the next blink, he fast traveled—air snapping—and appeared on the steps in front of me, blocking my path. His shoulders filled the narrow stairwell.
“What’s with you!” He demanded, and I exploded.
“What’s with me? What’s with YOU, Titus? You know I shouldn’t be surprised the shield projection didn’t work, because you have no problem risking my life as long as it gets you closer to your goals, tell me I’m wrong! You damn near gave Drax and I a heart attack when you flew through the waterfall on a hunch we would be safe, then you nearly drown me in the channel so you can practice sending me into a volcano full of lava, and then you throat fuck me to the point of nearly passing out, right after!! You don’t care if I fall or trip every time you change my glamour, or if I’m physically tired or sore, you don’t care that I slept alone after you marked me, you just don’t care Titus…you only care about yourself and your kingdom. Do you care about me or am I just a complicated convenience?”
My voice ricocheted off the stone. I was shaking by the end— rage, fear, humiliation, all tangled together—and I hated that he could do that to me. That he could make me feel like my life was a tool.
He initially appeared displeased, like he was about to cut me down with a lecture. Then his expression shifted—something heavy settling into his eyes. He sighed and rubbed his brows with one hand, like the weight had finally found him too.
“I’m learning, Delilah, my entire life I have lived for myself and my kingdom, then one day you, my Pickles, rips through the gods damn sky and turn my entire world upside down, I have never had feelings like this for anyone before, and a lot of the time I don’t know what the fuck I am doing.”
His voice roughened near the end. He stepped closer, but slower this time—like he was asking permission without saying the words.
Then he grabbed my arms below my shoulders gently, “but you are right, you, deserve better, help me be better, make a mate out of a monster.”
“Tell me one thing Titus,” I asked sharply, refusing to let the tenderness distract me.
“Anything.” He pleaded softly.
“Are you still sending me into mount Orid?”
His loving gaze crumbled with shame, and I already knew his answer before he said a word.
“That’s what I thought.” I said coldly as I pushed past him, brushing his shoulder as I squeezed by.
“It’s not that simple, NOTHING IS SIMPLE!! You expect me to just let thousands of people die that I swore to protect, when all I have to do is risk one life?”
I spun back, fury flaring so hot it made my vision swim. “IT’S MY FUCKING LIFE TITUS!!!” I scolded, and it echoed down the stone stairwell.
“Think logically Delilah, be reasonable, I’m begging you!!” His words reverberated down the stone stairwell, each echo carrying the same pain as the first. It was so hard to listen to that I almost caved, but I didn’t—because it wasn’t his life to risk. It was mine and risking it was my choice and only my choice.
I turned and stood on my toes to try to even our heights and get as close to his face as possible, because I wanted him to look me in the eyes for what I said next.
“Don’t you see?...I am not the same person that I was when I came here and agreed to your deal. That girl hated herself and didn’t care if she lived or not, but I’ve changed Titus, I VALUE MYSELF, I VALUE MY LIFE, I no longer need the God Dragon because I chose you, I chose to stay with you, Titus, if I risk my life getting the dagger now it would be only for you.”
Tears began to burn my eyes as I glared into those amber depths trying to convey everything, trying to make him understand. He came close and stroked the side of my face.
“You don’t understand, If we don’t get the God Dragon, there will not be a “here”forus, or for anyone who lives in my kingdom. They will come and kill us all.” He replied, his glare equally as burning as mine, but it wasn’t a look of anger or annoyance, it was pure fear. The High Lord was scared of losing everything. I had never seen him convey his vulnerability so openly.
He had a point. I chose him, but by doing so I chose to stay in a world on the path to destruction, what would that mean for Calpurnia, Cercies, Gleeda the dragons and the rest of the Fae?
I shook my head and squeezed my eyes shut. “There has to be another way! A diplomatic solution of some sort? The Water Fae don’t seem unreasonable.”
Both his hands grabbed his hair. “Gahh, There is no other way!!! Don’t you think I’ve tried??” He shouted in frustration and fully formed flames rolled off his shoulders, but I didn’t even flinch. I was immune to their intimidating effect by now.
