She almost called Junior and told him to come get the heroin and take it to his friend since he knew him. Yohana wasn’t sure why there was a nagging feeling in her gut. Even though she told herself she was tripping, after she got the heroin out of her storage unit, she removed her .22 from her purse and placed it in her lap. Yohana followed the directions of the GPS and found herself being led into a hood part of town. Yohana’s nerves suddenly went into overdrive. This was the first person that she was selling to that wasn’t family. The only other time she did, she didn’t technically sell to them because Jade’s brother played the middleman. What if it was a set up and the police were waiting to swoop in on her. By the time she arrived at the destination a thin layer of sweat was covering her top lip, and she vowed thiswould be the last time she sold to a stranger. Maybe selling drugs wasn’t for her after all.
Yohana pulled up and saw a light skinned guy with reddish brown hair and freckles sitting on the porch. He looked harmless enough. He stood up and walked over to the car. Yohana unlocked the doors, and he got in the car.
“Yohana?”
“Yeah. What’s your name?”
She saw him eye the gun. “Vic. I’m Junior’s homeboy.” He got in the car and pulled some money from his pockets. Yohana was so busy watching him count the money, that she didn’t notice someone walk up to the driver’s side of the car until it was too late. By the time she saw a figure in her peripheral vision, he was opening her car door and shoving a gun in her face. Yohana’s heart pounded hard in her chest as Vic grabbed the bag with the heroin in it and got out of the car. He didn’t say a word. Yohana couldn’t even turn her head to see who was sticking the barrel of his gun into her jaw. Her life flashed before her eyes. All she could think about was her son, and how devastated he would be if she got killed.
“Drive,” was the only thing the voice said before pulling the gun back, and he didn’t have to tell Yohana twice.
She was elated to only have lost two pounds and not her life. Her hands were trembling, and she needed to compose herself, but she was scared to stop. After she’d been driving for about five minutes, Yohana pulled into a gas station and erupted into tears. When she woke up that morning, getting robbed wasn’t on her to do list. She was just about to call Junior and see what was up with his homeboy when her phone rang. Tears ran down her face as she saw that Canyon was calling her. Yohana had promised herself to let him go until he could prove to her that his marriage was over for good, but she couldn’t think straight. She had to talk to somebody.
“Hello,” she answered with a sniffle.
Canyon’s eyebrows immediately snapped together. “Yo you good? You crying?”
“I-I just got robbed.” Yohana blew out a shaky breath and tried to compose herself.
“Where you at?” Canyon barked into the phone. He was pissed. That much she could tell, but she couldn’t see just how angry he was. Canyon was damn near foaming at the mouth.
“I’m at a gas station.”
“Go home. I’m on my way. Is your son there?”
“He stayed after school for a game.”
“I’m on my way.”
Yohana calmed down a bit simply knowing that Canyon was on the way. She didn’t want to like another woman’s husband. She had no intentions of getting in too deep with him, but she just needed to see his face for the moment. Yohana went from having a lover, friend, and confidant for fifteen years to suddenly being alone. It was an adjustment for her. She just wanted to be wrapped in some muscular arms and told that everything was going to be okay. When Yohana entered her house, she went straight to the bathroom to wash her red face.
When her doorbell rang, Yohana looked at herself in the mirror, and she looked a mess. Impressing Canyon wasn’t on the agenda however, so she went to let him in. As soon as she opened the door, he barged in.
“Did anybody touch you?” his nostrils flared as he looked her over.
“No.”
“They pulled a gun on you?”
She nodded before explaining what happened and when she got to the part about him sticking the gun in her face, Canyon clenched his jaw muscles together. “That muhfucka is dead. Call that Junior nigga.”
Yohana did as he asked, and the call went straight to voicemail. “That nigga is in on this shit. That Vic nigga would be dumb as hell to rob you when Junior could tell you everything about him. Vic probably isn’t even his real name. Bum ass niggas got you for two pounds,” Canyon frowned his face up in disgust. “That nigga your blood?”
“No. He’s my uncle’s wife’s nephew.”
“Pussy ass nigga,” Canyon gritted. “I want all the heroin that you have. You selling that shit is dead. I’ll give you the money back you paid for it and some extra.”
“Canyon, no you don’t have to do that. I appreciate it, but I can’t take any money from you. This is my issue, and I have to fix it.” He was still married, and she didn’t want to take large amounts of money from him.
Canyon kissed his teeth. “I’m not thinking about what you’re talking about. Did you feel anything for me?” he asked throwing her off.
“Yes. But ?”
“But nothing.” Canyon invaded her personal space. The panic he felt when she said she got robbed let him know just how deep his feelings ran for her. “You’re not a side bitch. You’re not a mistress. You’re not a placeholder while I try to figure out what I want to do. I’ve been over my marriage, but I just don’t want to hurt Cheyenne. I know the shit isn’t going to work, and I just need her to see for herself. If I press the issue of divorce without trying, then I’ll look like the bad guy. Maybe I am the bad guy. I didn’t ask to fall for you. I didn’t know you would come into my life. I just need you to have patience with me. Please. I’m begging, and I ain’t never begged for shit.”
He was wearing Yohana down. Lord knows, she wanted to stick to her guns. She wanted to deny him until he was officially single, but when he parted her lips with his tongue, she didn’t protest. Canyon kissed her like he meant it. He wanted hisactions to say what words didn’t convey. He wanted Yohana. He just had to break away from Cheyenne in a gentle way. Was it fair to her if he stayed with her out of obligation? He was sorry that she went to prison. He’d take care of her financially until the day she met someone else or died. Whichever came first, but he couldn’t love her the way that she wanted him to. It wasn’t even the time they spent apart. It was all the highs and lows that they went through while they were apart. Her lashing out at him, going months without calling him, accusing him of ruining her life. Six years of that had taken a toll on him that he couldn’t come back from.
He wanted to have sex with her, but he broke the kiss. He didn’t want Yohana to feel disrespected. It wasn’t just about sex with him. Plus, he had sex with Cheyenne earlier, and he didn’t even want to come at Yohana like that. He placed one hand on the back of her neck and rested his cheek against hers. “I’m coming back for you. Just know that.” He peered into her eyes. “How many pounds do you have left?”
