Before I could so much as wag my tail, she had me on my back with all four of my paws in the air, my hind leg going a mile a minute as she scratched the good spot. But I didn’t drop the weapon. No sir. I held on to that even through the seizure of pleasure.
“Okay, let’s get going. This place gives me the heebie-jeebies,” Keeks said, rising to her full height and shivering. “I wish Jonah were here.”
Her man didn’t leave his personal heaven, and until recently, neither did she, but when the boss calls, you answer.
I trotted ahead, wagging my tail to show she should follow. That worked well for a while, but then I started catching all kinds of new scents.
“Asshole... Asshole, no! Get back here. We do not have time for you to pee on every tree or funny stick you find.”
Joke’s on her. As long as we went in a mostly straight line, I could do both. Mark my territoryandkeep my word to the boss. I’d love to see a girl dog do that. No squatting for this boy. Just lift a leg and let it fly.
Like a frog in a sock.
I had no idea what that was supposed to mean, but I heard Hades say it once.
The river was close; I could smell it—souls and confusion mixed with desperation. It wasn’t my favorite place to be, that was for sure. You didn’t want to be in that water if you could help it; that was why most souls were brought by boat. But every once in a while, there was an... accident. The trapped souls were like piranhas. They’d zero in on fresh meat, and the newbie would end up as one of them for eternity. Not the best way to start your afterlife.
Once we reached the bank, Kiki stared at it with her hands on her hips. “How are we supposed to do this? Should I pick you up and slowly dunk you so you can submerge the dagger?”
I let out an aggravated growl, noping that suggestion before it could take hold. The indignity.
There was no way.
Besides, Keeks couldn’t get near that water, or they’d be on her like shit on a pig.
She backed away, hands up. “Okay, no help. Do your thing, little man. I’m just here for moral support, I guess.”
Huffing, I kicked my hind legs back a few times for good measure, then approached the murky water. It glowed an eerie green, and to the untrained eye, it might resemblebioluminescence. I knew the truth, though—that was the lost souls. Their energy signals were faint but still there, visible under the rushing water.
Fuck, I hated it here.
The shore wasn’t level at any part of the riverbank, because of course it wasn't. That would make things too easy. Cautiously, I approached the hill, needing the ground to stay put under my weight.
I took two tentative steps, a relieved yip leaving me just as I started to take a third.
What was that expression Janine always used? Pride comes before the fall?
I shoulda known better than to celebrate too early, cause the second I tried to touch land, there was nothing there. I was free-falling straight into that fucking river.
I swear I heard those fucking Fates laughing at me. But you know what? I didn’t let go of the dagger. I held it between my teeth like the hero I was.
Take that,the mother.
I started paddling the second I felt the water, but it was nearly impossible to know which way was up. It also didn’t help that the souls were reaching for me. I dodged them as best I could, and I think I’d done a hell of a job until that beautiful fucking woman tried to come to my rescue.
Gods-damned humans.
The souls turned away from me the instant she entered the river, targeting her with all the force of a laser rocket.
“Fuck,” I muttered around the blade.
In one moment she was there, above the water, the next she screamed and was dragged under. I was in a real fucking shituation. I couldn’t let go of the dagger, but there was no way I could save my girl in this form, and if anything happened to her, I wouldn’t just have to answer to myself. I’d be breaking Dahlia’sheart, Jonah’s, and the boss would never let me hear the end of it. Besides, Keeks gave the best belly rubs in the underworld, and... well, I loved her.
Releasing my hold on this preferred form, I let my body take its natural shape. One head became three, my body swelled to mammoth proportions, and pure rage filled me at the audacity of these lost souls.
My main head was in charge of the dagger. But that still left me with two others. With a vicious snarl, I snapped my right jaw in the direction of the souls, scaring them off like a school of fish coming up against a hungry shark. Once they scattered, Leftie swooped in and scooped up Kiki as gently as possible. She was still a soul clenched between my teeth, though, and there was no delicate way to do it. But I was doing the least amount of damage by far. Those wraiths would have sucked her dry and turned her into one of them in a matter of minutes.
Paddling to the shore, I kept her well out of their reach, her limp form making me worry I’d been too late. I laid her down on the path before shifting back into the fluff ball she knew and loved. She was okay, she had to be.
