His hand drops. His expression doesn't change, but I see something like hurt, or frustration, flicker in his eyes.
I don't care.
"This way," he says, his voice calm and neutral, as if nothing that just happened affected him.
I follow him inside. The interior is warm and comfortable, and not much to write home about. Simple furnishings, wooden floors, everything clean and in its place. The windows aren't very large, probably for security, but the view from them is beautiful.
"Your room is upstairs," Andrei says, leading me to a staircase. "First door on the right."
I climb the stairs without responding, feeling his presence behind me like a shadow. The hallway at the top is short, with only three doors. He opens the first one and steps aside to let me enter. The room is beautiful, and comfortable, just like everything else in this house. It's clearly meant to give the feeling of safety, even if the reason for coming here is that the person in the house is literallynotsafe.
There's a large bed, a wing chair by the window with a small table and reading lamp, a closet and wardrobe. The bathroom is, I assume, down the hall. And the window has that same gorgeous forest view.
"There's toiletries in the bathroom," Andrei says from the doorway. "Everything you should need."
"How thoughtful." My voice is still flat and empty.
"Liesl—"
I set my bag down on the bed. "I'd like to be alone now."
Andrei lets out a slow breath. "I need to go back. To handle the situation. I don't know how long I'll be gone."
"Okay."
"There are guards posted around the property. You'll be safe here."
"You said that already."
There's another silence. I can feel him standing there, wanting to say something, to bridge this distance between ussomehow. I don't turn around. Don't give him anything to work with.
"I'll come back as soon as I can," he says finally.
"Okay."
I hear him take a breath, start to say something, then stop. Then his footsteps retreat down the hallway, and a moment later I hear the front door close.
I'm alone.
The loneliness hits immediately.
I stand at the window, watching darkness swallow the forest, and I feel the weight of isolation settle over me. The house is silent except for the faint hum of heating and the occasional creak of settling wood. The guards are all outside. It's just me and this empty room. No one else in the house.
I should be relieved—grateful for the space, the distance from Andrei, his violence and his impossible demands.
Instead, I feel like I'm suffocating.
I move to the bed and sit down, then stand up again.This is what you wanted,I tell myself.Distance. Space. Time away from him to think clearly.
But thinking clearly just makes everything worse. Because when I think clearly, I remember the way he moved through the estate, killing without hesitation to protect me. The way he looked at me in my room with bodies on the floor, possessive, and completely unrepentant.
The way he held me two nights ago, tender and vulnerable, so unlike the monster everyone says he is.
I don't know which version is real. I don't know if both can exist in the same person, or if I've been fooling myself this whole time, seeing what I wanted to see instead of what was actually there.
I go down the hall, strip off my clothes, and step into the shower. The water is hot, almost scalding, and I stand underit until my skin turns pink and the bathroom fills with steam. When I finally emerge, I'm so exhausted that I tumble onto the bed, still wrapped in my towel, and fall asleep.
—
