I let him take my hand because pulling my hand away in that room would have set off every person in it. Mrs. Park wasreading. Kit had a crossword on his lap and a pen behind his ear and the look he had on a busy night at the bar when he was, by sheer force, refusing to be overwhelmed.
He spoke quietly. "Sabrina, are you okay?"
"I'm scared, Beau."
"I know."
"I want her out."
He put his arm around me.
I leaned into him because I couldn't pull away in that room.
He thinks he is comforting me.
He is comforting himself.
By the fourth hour, the lounge had gotten quiet.
The lounge door opened, and Simon Kessler was in the doorway. He was in the same cheap suit. He was alone, and he was holding a folder.
Beau went white when Simon walked in.
"Mr. Cross."
Beau stood up. "Simon."
"I'm sorry to interrupt. I wouldn't be here. I called the foundation this morning to ask about my son's surgery date. They told me he had been bumped. They didn't say how and why, but they said it was a chairman's decision, and I knew I could find you here just like before, so I drove to talk to you."
Beau hesitated, like the words had left him and weren’t coming back.
"Mr. Cross, my son was scheduled for today. It was canceled, and the next slot is too far."
The lounge was very still.
"Mr. Cross, please, my son has been fasting since last night. He is at home asking my wife when we are going to leave for the hospital. I have to go home and tell him it’s not happening. I'm here because I want to know why. I'm not yelling. I just want to know why."
"Simon."
"Mr. Cross. Why?"
Beau was silent.
Simon's eyes moved and looked at me, then at Beau. He looked at the surgical board on the wall — the board with the names and the timers, the board with VELA B and a timer that had been ticking for some part of the morning.
His face changed. "Mr. Cross, whose surgery is happening right now?"
"Simon — "
I stood up and walked to him. "Mr. Kessler."
"Yes."
"My name is Sabrina Vela. My daughter is Bonnie. She is in the surgery you can see on that board. She is eight years old and has been on the foundation's waitlist for over a year. Her cardiologist told me three days ago she had weeks. I didn't know until some time ago that my daughter was on that table because Beau took the slot from your son."
Simon stared at me. "You didn't know?"
"I didn't know."
