So that’s what this is really about.
“I'm not going to realize that he's better for me or that I still love him,” I say what he can't. “I only want you. But wanting you means accepting that Cash is part of the deal. I'm trying and all you're doing is sending me mixed signals. If I don't get along with Cash, you feel secure in our relationship but insecure in your friendship with him. If I do get along with Cash, you feel insecure in our relationship. You can't have it both ways.”
Wilder exhales heavily. “Cash and I are solid.”
“Are you?”
“After everything I've done, he's still here,” Wilder says with a shrug.
“And I won't always be?” I conclude.
“I didn't say that, Blondie,” he argues as he raises a dark eyebrow. “I was trying to get out that my friendship status with Cash isn't dependent on how well you two get along.”
“But it makes your life easier,” I say as I cross my hands over my chest.
“It makes this trip easier,” he clarifies. “When I asked you to try to get along with him, I didn't mean to become his best friend. I meant to be civil.”
“I am being civil,” I defend myself.
“He's still in love with you,” Wilder confesses.
What?
No, Cash isn’t. He hasn’t been in love with me for a long time.
I swallow hard. “No, he's not.”
Wilder sighs and runs a hand over his face. “He is. I can see it written all over his face.”
“Then why are we driving across the country so he can meet another girl?” I let out an exasperated sigh.
He shakes his dark head. “I haven't figured that part out yet.”
“Because there's nothing to figure out.” I narrow my eyes. “I'm in love with you, and he's meeting someone he's been talking to for the past year.”
Wilder chews on the inside of his cheek. “I guess we'll see.”
Annoyed, I blow out a tired breath. “Are we done fighting now?”
He hitches his shoulder. “I don't know.”
“Well,” I say as I step forward. “I say we are. Now, kiss me.”
Despite his best brooding efforts, he smiles. “No.”
“Yes,” I argue as I wrap my arms around his neck. “Kiss me.”
He slowly shakes his head. “No.”
“Kiss me, Wilder.”
Finally, he gives in and bends his head. As our lips collide, the worry in my stomach coils tight like a fist. I don't know why this moment feels so pivotal.
But it does.
Because all I can think is: will this be one of those fights I look back on and know it was beginning of the end?
Or will it be just a blip on our radar?
