For a moment, she dipped into his mind. He was scared she was holding back because she didn’t really care for him. That she was grateful and curious, and she wanted him. But that she didn’t love him and never would.
“It’s not that. The truth is I don’t know how I feel, and it’s a mess in there, and... I’m working on it. Okay?”
“No, not really. But it will have to be for now.” He leaned down and pressed a kiss to her mouth. And then eased his hand from inside her pants. He rolled onto his back, away from her.
What the hell?
He sighed. “When you’re ready, we’ll finish this.”
“I am ready. I’m more than ready.”
“No, you’re not. But you will be.”
“I can’t believe you’re doing this. Or rather not doing this.” She sat up and glared at him.
“Believe me, it’s hurting me more than it’s hurting you.”
She looked down the length of his body. She could see the hard line of his erection, and a twinge of pleasure shot through her. She’d had the best orgasm of her life just from his fingers. What would the rest of him feel like? She licked her lips and he groaned.
He wanted her. He’d wanted her for a long time, and she was handing herself to him on a plate. And he was refusing. “You’rejust being contrary; you know that, don’t you? And I’m supposed to be the contrary one. Not you.”
He smiled. “Maybe it’s catching. And it’s easily solved. Just let me in.”
Could she do it? Could she let him see her thoughts and her fears? Could she let him see what she really thought about him, in the deep recesses of her mind? The truth was, she wasn’t sure herself, and that was maybe why she was finding it so hard.
She inched closer and lowered her head and kissed him. Then she kissed his cheek and his jaw and then the skin of his throat where she could feel the sharp prickly hair growth. He hadn’t shaved in a while. He’d been too busy saving her ass.
She leaned back a little, then trailed her fingers over his chest. His sweater was soft, probably cashmere—she’d learned he had a love for the nicer things in life. She rested her palm over his heart, feeling the slow, steady thud. She didn’t want his heart slow and steady; she wanted it racing madly.
Sliding her hand lower, she felt the hard resilience of muscle, then she played her fingers along the waistband of his jeans. Then even lower. Her nails grazing over the impressive length of his erection. He groaned and she glanced up at his face. His eyes were half closed, a dull flush shadowing his cheekbones.
“Kaitlin...”
But suddenly she didn’t want to play that game anymore. She suspected—without going into his head, which right now seemed unfair when she was banning him from her own thoughts—that if she pushed him just a little more, he would break and take what she was so clearly offering.
But she didn’t want to break him.
When they came together, she wanted it to be...epic. And where had that come from?
Sam had once said that. That love should be epic. She’d laughed at him at the time, and he’d told her to wait and see.
So she didn’t push Kane further, instead she lowered her head and laid it on his chest. His arms came around her. His heart was beating faster now, and she smiled.
He wanted her.
At that moment, someone banged on the door.
“Fuck off,” Kane shouted.
She chuckled. She had an idea that wasn’t going to happen.
“You might want to get your asses out of bed,” Rose shouted. “Christa is calling. I told her the two of you had disappeared into the bedroom, but she says you’ll want to hear this.”
Kaitlin felt the tension run through him. Their little interlude was over. She pushed herself up. “This better be good.”
Chapter 26
Kane lay back on the bed and watched, arms clasped behind his head, as Kaitlin groped for her sweater on the floor, then tugged it over her head.
