“Shame,” Bex remarked.
“I wouldn’t say that,” I said. “And it’s for the best anyway.”
“I know, I know.I’m too busy for love, blah blah blah. It’s just …” She sighed again. “Are you not worried about missing out on stuff like relationships and, I dunno,life?”
I shrugged. “There’s plenty of time for all that.”
“There is until there isn’t,” she said. “There’s more to life than work. I worry you don’t have that balance.”
“I’ll work on it,” I said idly. “But what would make me feel more balanced is a pay rise.” I waved my pack of cheap teabags, discounted due to a tear in the box.
“For God’s sake, we can share tea,” Bex said. “I keep telling you. Still no new job prospects?”
I shook my head. I was subscribed to every job alert possible, but the right sort of jobs that paid a living wage were rarely available and hotly contested. One time I’d got through to the final round of interviews for an exciting developmentassistant role at Working Title, only for the daughter of an award-winning cinematographer to swoop in out of nowhere to get the job. Last time I saw her she was on stage collecting a BAFTA. “The search continues.”
“I find it staggering with all your experience,” she said. “You’ve worked on actual film sets and survived six years with Lin – who, by the way, would probably be out of business in seconds without you. That should see you walk into a better job.”
“It’s not how the industry works,” I said. “I’m a nobody until somebody says I’m not.”
“That’s fucking bleak,” Bex said. “You’re brilliant and Lin is holding you back.”
“Okay, but Lin knows everyone worth knowing,” I said. “When I interviewed for the role—”
“Afew years with me, you’ll know all the key players in the industry,” Bex parroted gently. “She’s gatekeeping. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. You’re so good at your job, she can’t let you leave. She breadcrumbs all these promises but doesn’t follow through.” She furrowed her eyebrows. “Tell me I’m wrong.”
“You’re not wrong,” I muttered. On my worst days, leaving Temper Media was all I could think about. But then it would take just a little bit of enlightening conversation with one of the directors Lin looked after and I’d remember why I had the ambition I did and park the idea of quitting, holding on to the sliver of hope that Lin might advance me, offer me more responsibility. It was a relentless cycle. As I waited for my tea to mash, I watched Bex pull a bottle of water out of the fridge, nibbling her lip. She caught my gaze and averted her eyes quickly. Too quickly.
“Anyway, what’s with you – everything all right?” I asked.
“Fine!” She fiddled with the bottle lid. “Just looking out for my bestie, as usual.”
“You sure?”
“What do you mean?” She turned away with a huff and my tummy vaulted. Bex was rarely ruffled. There was nothing we couldn’t say to each other, so whatever this was must be bad.
“Oh, God,what?”
Bex turned, drank deeply from her bottle, then took a big breath. “Dan and I have been talking.”
“And?” I sensed I should sit, so I finished making my tea then sat at the table. Dan was Bex’s long-time boyfriend and possibly the only human being good enough for Bex in my opinion. “You guys are okay?”
“We’re fine.” Bex joined me at the table. “More than. We’re talking about moving in together.”
I thudded my mug on the table so hard tea slopped onto the surface. “Really? Are you serious?”
The sweetest of smiles blossomed across her face. “Yep.”
“As in, here? Or … somewhere else?”Without me?I pushed that negative thought aside and threw my arms around her narrow shoulders. “That’s amazing! I’m so happy for you! God, you had me worrying that you were splitting up or something.”
“As if.” Bex squeezed me tight. “We’re looking at Hertford. It’s not too far from his family and the commute is perfect for both of us. There’s this house—”
I whistled, pulling back. “A house?”
“Yeah,” Bex said, blushing. “A whole house. Fixer-upper. He does the construction stuff; I make it fabulous.”
“You – you’re buying?” This was big-time adulting, a financial commitment I couldn’t even begin to imagine making. But Bex’s eyes were shining with excitement. “Mate, I’m thrilled for you, really.” Even as the words left my mouth, my genuine happiness was replaced by foreboding. There was no way I could afford to stay in this flat alone, not on my salary, and finding anywhere else decent on my budget would be nigh on impossible.
“Thanks,” Bex said, with obvious relief. “The lease is up in six months on this place, and it’ll take at least that long for the sale to go through, if it does at all. So you’ve got plenty of time to figure out your situation.”
