“The one with dementia?” Wolfie asked. “Yes, you mentioned him.”
“He died. Young.” Wolfie didn’t comment. “My Aunty Pauline fell to pieces. She couldn’t even talk. Took to her bed for weeks. Mum and Dad were worried sick. And my cousin, Frankie…” Pippa’s heart ached as she thought back to those days, to darling Frankie as a frightened teenager who had needed his mum more than he ever had before and she simply wasn’t there. “It was an awful time, but this town rallied around him,” she said. “Around both of them, actually, and it was like a miracle. My family obviously supported Frankie loads but my dad worked, and Mum had her hands full with Aunty Pauline. So, the neighbours stepped in. Made sure Frankie never had to worry about food or company. People would take turns to visit and do the laundry, run a hoover around. That sort of thing. For a time, he was a proper terror; skipping school and acting out. But this town showed him so much love. Even our teachers! They were so patient, visiting him at home, giving him free tutoring.” Pippa stopped walking and raised damp eyes to Wolfie’s. “This town saved my cousin in every way he needed to be and it’s the most wonderful thing I’ve ever seen. Ever since then I’ve felt – I’veknown– I had to give something back.”
Wolfie went very still. “I–I didn’t realise,” he said, so quietly Pippa could barely hear.
Pippa rubbed her eyes. “And Squires, yeah, I know it’s only a house, but every summer the community would gather here and be happy and it always made me feel so secure, so grounded. Like, anything could happen, and this town would make it all right. Who wouldn’t want to grow old and raise their kids in a town like that?”
“You want children?” was the quick question.
For some reason, Pippa wished she hadn’t divulged that last bit about children. It felt so personal, putting out her fondest wish, one that had seemed certain to come true when she was with Alex. But Alex had rejected that life for something else and the fear that children might never happen was now very real. Facing that had sent her adrift and for a crazy moment she wished she could grab Wolfie’s hand, so she could touch something solid and true. “I’d like to, one day,” she admitted. “You?”
Wolfie was silent for a few moments. “I can’t say I’ve given it much thought,” he replied eventually.
Pippa didn’t say anything. It didn’t shock her. The biological clock moved at a different pace for men.
“Your parents emigrated, didn’t they?” Wolfie changed the subject and Pippa was impressed with his memory.
“Yes,” Pippa said. “They retired to Florida. Something my dad always wanted.”
“So,theyleft.” It wasn’t a question, but entirely understandable given Pippa’s devotion to the town.
“They did,” she said. “Thing is, they had me young. They didn’t have much money and it was tough; my dad worked all the hours. That meant no big holidays, no adventures. It was always my dad’s dream from a young age to live abroad, so they made up for the lack of holidays when he retired.”
“Was it your mum’s dream?”
Pippa exhaled. She’d never even considered that aspect. Her parents were so in sync, so loving, that when they announced their emigration, Pippa had presumed it was a wholly mutual ambition. “Honestly, I don’t know. But she really enjoys living out there. I suppose when you love someone enough, all you need is to be where they are.” And the irony of her words hit Pippa squarely in the gut. Her legs became heavy, and her heart thudded in her chest as she inwardly repeated her own words back to herself.
“What’s wrong?” Wolfie’s face contorted in alarm, and he gripped her shoulder. “You’ve gone terribly pale.”
Pippa searched Wolfie’s face. How was it that after all this time apart from Alex, she had only now stumbled upon the truth of their break-up? The thing that twisted her conscience every time she thought of him. Why hadn’t she seen it? She and Alex had created a home together and that should have been enough for him. Yet the reality was it also hadn’t been enough forher. Because surely, if it had, she would have followed him to Kent. She would have found a way to stay with him. Waves of an unnamed emotion washed over her. Relief? Pity? Pippa didn’t know. She also didn’t know why those roiling emotions ebbed away when she looked at Wolfie, leaving a welcome stillness.
But Wolfie wasn’t looking back at her. He had turned towards the trees, his face lit up. “Hang on, isn’t that our missing pig?”
Pippa was glad then that he wasn’t looking at her. Because that earlier need to reach for his hand was intensifying into something more urgent and Wolfie might have recognised it. And that prospect was terrifying. She tried to calm her ragged breathing and followed Wolfie’s gaze. Sure enough, Juniper could be seen gambolling amongst the trees, stopping every now and then for a root.
“Thank goodness!” Pippa pulled out her phone, glad to find something to do with her hands. “I’ll text Todd.” She sent a quick message, dropping a pin in her map application to indicate their location to send to him. But the phone beeped – no signal. “Ha, one thing not to love about this town,” she remarked. “Patchy signal!”
“Let’s try up here.” Wolfie gestured up the slope towards Squires. Raising her phone, Pippa followed Wolfie, waving the device about in the mission for bars. “Watch your step!” Wolfie urged but just as he said it, his foot plunged into a slurpy patch of boggy ground, knocking him off balance. With a yelp, he suddenly pitched forward, crashing into Pippa, his weight knocking her down and sending the two of them into a tumble down the slope, landing square in squelching, cold, mud.
Pippa took a few seconds to catch her breath, only to find herself strewn across Wolfie’s lap, her bum and legs caked in mud. Wolfie hadn’t fared much better. Before either of them could say a word, Juniper was there, snuffling around them with great curiosity as if to say, ‘Who are you?’
Pippa looked over at Wolfie, expecting to find him outraged, but he was chuckling away as Juniper’s huge snout nudged at his side.
“There you are, old girl.” He patted Juniper’s coarse head. “You’ve got a fair few people worried about you.” Juniper grunted and Wolfie nodded as if in conversation. “All right, I’ll get up.” With some difficulty, Wolfie pulled himself to a standing position, lips pursed in concentration as he navigated the slippery ground. He then reached a hand to Pippa. “Staying there all day?”
Pippa grabbed his hand, and he pulled her up as if she were lighter than air. She stammered a thanks and as she did, her phone indicated the text to Todd had finally got through.
“Suppose we’d best get back to Squires and clean up,” Wolfie said. Pippa noticed he hadn’t let go of her hand. Irritated at how giddy that made her feel, she whipped her hand from his grasp. God, she was such a schoolgirl about him. But being in a relationship for more than a decade with Alex had rendered her totally useless at reading signals from any other man. Her instincts were screaming at her to show some kind of encouragement towards Wolfie, but she didn’t know how. Besides, she still wasn’t sure if he had a girlfriend or not. If he did, then he had no business holding her hand like that. Trembling, Pippa stepped back, smiling weakly as Juniper busied herself with the ground around their feet.
“Good idea. I have company coming over,” Pippa said.
“You do?” Mild concern flickered across Wolfie’s face.
“Yes,” she said. “Don’t worry. I’ll get to my tasks for the day soon enough.”
“Take all the time you need,” Wolfie said. “I expect the sale to go through soon, so you don’t need to worry too much. It’ll be someone else’s problem.”
His voice was so cheery that Pippa had to turn away. “Okay.”
