“And it’s the final memory I have of her.”
CHAPTERTWENTY-ONE
Cassandra couldn’t stand it, almost couldn’t bear to listen to the rest of Tristan’s heart-rending story.
She’d maintained the grip on his hand, but suspected that small bit of contact wouldn’t be enough for him.
She didn’t take the time to weigh the decision. Tristan’s head shot up as the legs of her chair scraped across the bricks. His eyes trailed over her warily, but he didn’t push her away as she crawled into his lap and settled her ear against his heart.
“Please tell me the rest,” she whispered.
Tristan sucked in a shuddering breath as he encircled her in his arms, clasping his hands together and resting them at her hip.
“I’m not sure why Eamon did what he did. I assume he was jealous of me, jealous that I would be Emperor one day and he would not. Or maybe he was envious of what I had with Ione. Perhaps he was even jealous ofher, that I’d spent so much of my time with this human and therefore had little to spare for my doting younger brother.”
Tristan's derisive snort stirred Cassandra’s hair.
“Whatever the reason, he told my father everything.
“I assume Ione and I were ambushed the next night. Once our plans had been thwarted, they sent me to the Temple in Thalenn and pulled my memory of the Turning. I have the scar, so we must’ve gotten at least part-way through it. But I don’t know if she was fully Turned, or if we were interrupted before we finished the ceremony.
“After I returned from Thalenn to await my official public sentencing in the palace dungeons—a complete farce, since my parents had already decided what to do with me—Eamon paid me a visit. Didn’t say a single word, just dropped the pearl ring, coated in dried blood, into my hand and walked away.
“That was the last time I sawhimbefore last week.
“To this day, I have no idea what happened to Ione.
“After I’d been banished to the colonies, taking her last name as a finalfuck youto my family, I spent a few fruitless years looking for her. But no one had any information and I was worried that, if by some miracle she were still alive, my search might endanger her.
“I gave up on the search, then spent a few more years wishing for death. Wondering why my father had decided to let me live in exile rather than ending me for my insolence. They’d made sure I was taken care of, even in my banishment, but I couldn’t stomach the thought of spending a singledrachathat had been earned by the pain and suffering of Ione’s species. I wandered the colonies aimlessly, cursing the High Gods for not letting me die. For forcing me to live with the agony of knowing that not only had I failed Ione—”
His breath caught and she flattened a palm against his chest, rubbing in soothing circles as if she could will away the pain in his heart.
“But that I’d failed her people. Failed all of Ethyrios, really.
“Failed you,” he whispered.
“Tristan,” she choked out, overcome.
“Somehow, I ended up back in Thalenn, moping around the Fang and Claw until Reena had enough of my bullshit and told me I could either take a job at her place or get off her property.” He chuckled at the memory.
“But I wanted to do something withpurpose, something to help the humans after the disaster I’d caused. The Vicereine knew who I was, practically salivated at the chance to make me a member of her Vestian Guards after I refused to become a councilor in her sham government.
“And that’s what I’ve been doing for the past two hundred years. Protecting the humans of the colonies, in whatever small way I can, to try to atone for my sins against them. For my family’s sins against them.”
Tristan rested his chin on her head and let out a long, slow exhale, so similar to a breath that signaled the end of a memory extraction. And perhaps he did feel like a supplicant, relieved to excise this story from his troubled brain and have no more secrets between them.
Except her own.
“Tristan?” she whispered.
“Mmm?” He’d unclasped his hands and was rubbing them along her hip and thigh.
“Do you remember that night at the Serpent’s Den? When you said one day we could be brave together?”
“I didn’t tell you all this to force you to share things you’re not ready to share.”
She pressed her palm against his and interlaced their fingers. “My mother is an obliviate.”
