Zahara lowered herself to the deck beside me. I sensed the pain that wracked her body, the slowness and tight hisses that accompanied the captain as she struggled to sit. For a minute, we both continued to stare out into the vastness of the open sea.
“The Royal Vanguard will be on our tail now,” Zahara murmured in the night, breaking the silence between us. The captain let out a sigh as if drawing out the time between her next words. “If you want to leave, now is the time to do it.”
I shot her a bewildered look. Running never crossed my mind, not when my people lost their lives in vain for power or when innocents fled in fear across the land. The crew had the only plan capable of taking down the Royal Vanguard and their gilded beasts imbued with merfolk powers. They needed me. No one else could capture the Oceanwrought trident piece, and I wouldn’t admit it aloud, but an innate part of me needed them, too.
Where else would I go?
“I’m not running,” I replied sternly.
“Good.”
“Why did Raoku let me go? He could have taken me tonight, but instead, he just… left,” A deep innate part of me begged to know ever since he disappeared, but I couldn’t come up with a solid reason alone.
“Because one out of the hundreds of sacrifices a year does not make as much of a difference as you think.”
I gasped, a whimper escaping with the influx of air and disbelief. “Hundreds? I was told it was only one every decade.” The words died on my lips. Bile rose against my throat, the acidic taste lathering my taste buds.
“It once was. You give someone that much power, even for a heartbeat, and it’ll be all they ever want,” Zahara voiced, full of dread.
We fell silent for a moment, the truth sinking in.
“Do you ever miss it?” Zahara asked softly, gesturing out toward the open water.
The ocean worked to kill me, but I escaped it, survived it… and still, I wasn’t sure I hadn’t left something of myself behind.
If anything Noctis admitted was true about our past, though, I would assume I wouldn’t have missed it at all before the sacrifice—that the only thing the ocean brought was trepidation and naive dedication.
“It’s impossible to miss something you know nothing about,” I muttered, the ache of missing my memories becoming painful. “I should want to leave, but I don’t. I feel tied to the Terraguard Bound, like some part of me belongs here. Even if I don’t understand why.”
Zahara hummed, her fingers lacing through the robin’s-egg blue fabric she fidgeted with, threads stripping apart from apparent years of contact. “Funny. I’ve lived my whole life here,in the Terraguard Bound. The soil’s in my blood,” she sighed with a bitter edge. “But my heart? It’s out there somewhere beneath those waves. The ocean keeps what it takes.”
She quickly averted her gaze, her empty hand lifting to her face, wiping away tears that silently slid down her ebony skin. Whatever she lost was enough for her to wage war, and I yearned to fight at her side. The pirate welcomed me on the ship, saved me from the raging Tide Reapers, and her crew risked themselves to keep me alive—first in the forest and then again on the ship against the Royal Vanguard. A debt I felt obligated to repay.
“Will you teach me to sail? Of course, when my ankle isn’t shattered to oblivion,” I asked with a slight chuckle, not wanting to push Zahara to speak on her losses, especially when it didn’t seem she felt comfortable. Grief isn’t a tale you can pull from someone. It’s one they offer when they are ready to bear the weight of the words.
I also needed something to keep my mind busy, something to do with my hands that didn’t involve flipping a dagger like practiced ease.
“I will,” Zahara answered, her voice faintly shaking. “Because you sacrificed yourself tonight for me and my boys.”
Sacrificed.In a different context, that word tore into my being, but to sacrifice for the ones I already cared about gave me a sense of pride.
“How long have you known them?”
“Almost two years. It truly seems that people keep showing up on my ship right when they’re needed.”
The captain paused, drawing a shaky breath that seemed to carry years of pain. Then, her voice broke, soft and heavy, like a wound reopened.
“Jun and Calvin… they’re all that remain of my world now.”
My hand wrapped around hers, offering what little comfort I could. Zahara accepted it. Some pains aren’t meant tobe understood… and hers was one of them. But I could help keep the ones I began to cherish safe.
“When we find the trident, I hope you use the titan to painfully tear down the monster that stole your heart from you.” Fury laced my voice.
“I’ll tear through every sea beast out there. One by one.”
“Then let’s burn it all down, by the gods.”
“By the gods, except… not Noctis.”
