‘I have been in agony since the day I met you, unable to reveal my true feelings. But now, I am unshackled from those restraints, and I can offer myself to you—with a heart that has been yours since the beginning of our acquaintance.’
‘Your Grace, I have told you before—I do not wish to be your kept woman.’
She withdrew her hands. Still weak, she had to clutch the armrest for support, needing to put some distance between them.
‘No, you misunderstand me.’ His voice was firm, unwavering. Grace stilled.
‘I do not want you as my mistress. I have never wanted you as a mistress—I could never treat you with such dishonour,’ he said with quiet determination. ‘I want you to be my wife. I have wanted to marry you since the moment we met at Skye Manor.’ He took her hand, his hold possessive. ‘I love you, deeply, Grace.’
Grace gasped. ‘Then why—’
‘For the longest time, I was held back from expressing my feelings because of my engagement to Jane. So many times, I wanted to tell you when we were at Skye Manor, but I could not bring myself to do it. I wanted to find a way to break off myengagement to Jane, but I could not think of an honourable way of doing so. I felt... trapped.
‘I told myself it was for the best when I reached London.’ His face twisted in pain. ‘Harry, as I now know, had already attempted to kill me, and I knew that if he could not get to me, he would attempt to harm those I love.’ His gaze locked onto hers. Grace remembered the poisoned decanters in his room.
‘At that time, I could trust no one and had no way of knowing where the next threat would come from. I had to pretend that I did not care for you. Ever since you arrived in London, I have tried to distance myself from you. I barely acknowledged you in public. I feared for your safety—especially after multiple attempts were made on my life.’
‘Multiple attempts?’ Grace gasped. ‘I thought there was only one—the poisoned decanters!’
‘There were others,’ he admitted grimly. ‘Shadow was spooked on my usual riding route, and a friend of mine in the gambling dens tipped me off that women were being offered money to kill me. I did not know whether it was Edward, Harry, or both who were plotting against me. Not knowing if I would live past their next attempt prevented me from expressing my true feelings to you. I did not want to make promises when I did not even know if I would survive.
‘I told myself it was better this way—to not form an attachment. Then, if anything happened to me, you could move on with your life, believing I did not care for you in that way.’
Grace could only stare at him, heart pounding.
He ran a hand through his hair. ‘But you... you have a way of making me lose control. That night, when I kissed your cheek, I felt ashamed of my behaviour. Strictly speaking, I was still engaged to Jane, even though I already knew I would end things with her. She, however, beat me to it the next day.’ He gave a wry smile.
‘After I was free from my engagement, I cannot describe to you my relief. I was elated that I could now have you—properly, without any entanglements. But I held back from telling you. We were so close to narrowing down our suspect, Edward, at the time. I wanted to ensure we captured him first, and then I told myself I would tell you how I felt.’
Tears pricked and Grace suppressed a sob, ‘I was so confused with your behaviour.’ She could not prevent the accusatory tone in her voice.
His voice softened, as did his expression. ‘I needed to appear indifferent to you. It was the only way to convince others that I did not care. You must understand, Grace, as a Duke, my every move is scrutinised. If I so much as glance at a lady by accident, the gossipmongers among thetonweave an epic love story out of thin air. You know that to be true.’ He pleaded.
Sniffing loudly, Grace folded her arms. ‘I do not think you are such a skilled actor, sir. At the ball, you were atrocious! You glowered at me all night and even went out of your way to drive other dancers away.’
He held his hands up in surrender.
‘Yes, you are quite right. Despite my efforts, I still let my feelings for you slip on occasion—that waltz. I berated myself for my weakness.’ He shook his head. ‘Jealousy got the best of me that night. You looked so beautiful, and when I saw how many men wished to be introduced to you, I could not help myself. I should not have acted as I did.
‘After that waltz, in a moment of weakness, I wanted to tell you then how I felt—which is why I led you to the fountain, thinking it would be secluded.’
Grace narrowed her eyes. ‘Then why, pray tell, did you make me an offer to be yourmistress?’
His jaw tightened. ‘I was forced to make you hate me—to prevent a greater calamity. I saw someone spying on us thatnight—Harry, as you know—and I could not let him suspect an attachment between us. I knew your self-respect would never allow you to accept such a fate, and I counted on your temper to push me away—quite literally, may I add.’ His lips quirked in a rueful smile.
Grace inhaled sharply.Thatwas why he had looked over her head so intently at the fountain. She recalled that moment now—how his face had suddenly changed.
He continued. ‘Yes. I realised it too late. If you had become a target for the murderer, I could never have forgiven myself. I even had to go to great lengths to keep you out of the scandal sheets. There was a rumour going around that you were my...’ He hesitated.
Grace’s eyes widened. ‘Harry was the one who started that rumour.’
‘Yes.’ The Duke exhaled.
She shook her head in disbelief. ‘So, everything you said at the ball was a lie?’
His lips twitched. ‘Every single word.’
She huffed. ‘Youcouldhave told me that sooner.’
