He shakes his head, looking at the room around him like he doesn’t know where he is. ‘They’ve called an ambulance, they think Mum might’ve had a stroke. They’re waiting on paramedics right now.’
I inhale a deep, shocked breath. ‘That’s horrendous. I’m so sorry, Edward…’ I am lost. I want to help but don’t know what to do. ‘Can I help? Do anything?’ He looks at me again, his expression foggy, but shakes his head after a moment. He stares down at his phone, checking something. His fingers are shaking; it’s clear he’s really scared. My heart hurts for him.
‘Damn,’ he murmurs, and I step forward minutely.
‘What?’
‘The trains…’ He looks flustered. ‘They’re delayed, there’s a shortage of crew and…’
I step forward again. ‘I know, I drove in today because of the problems, so I have my car outside. Can I drive you?’
He stares at me a little blankly and then shakes his head. ‘No, Olivia, I can’t ask you to do that. It’s nearly three hours, I can’t… I don’t—’
I take another step; a bigger one this time. ‘I’m driving you.’ I make sure it’s not a question this time and he slowly nods.
‘Okay, would you mind? Thank you.’
I pick up his coat for him, helping him into it. He suddenly seems so intensely vulnerable. I feel the reversal of roles keenly and fight an urge to gather him up into me for a hug.
We don’t say much as I lead him to my car, and we takeoff across London in the direction of the M4. Beside me in the passenger seat, I can feel he’s trying to gather himself.
‘I’m sure she’s fine,’ he says at last, finding his voice.
I nod.
‘My brother Jake is a catastrophiser,’ he continues. ‘She’s probably just got a headache or something.’
I nod again, pulling up at some traffic lights and mentally urging them to hurry up and change.
‘They say the first few hours are key, don’t they?’ he says, and I nod yet again. ‘Maybe I’ll just text to see if the ambulance has turned up yet.’ He adds this casually, but I catch his hands still trembling a little in his lap as he types. ‘You hear all these horror stories about the NHS these days, don’t you? About people waiting hours for an ambulance to show up and then they don’t come at all.’
‘It’ll come,’ I say with confidence, feeling none of it.
We sit in silence for a few minutes as he stares down at his phone, waiting for a reply.
Beside me, Edward suddenly breathes out. ‘Jake says a first responder is on his way. They’ll be there in the next hour to assess her.’
‘That’s good,’ I say decisively. ‘They’ll know what to do.’ I check the satnav, still two hours to go.Please let his mum be okay. I reach over to pat his arm. ‘We’ll be there before you know it,’ I tell him, sneaking a glance across at my therapist. ‘Just hold on, Edward. Hold on for a bit longer.’
He nods, as we make eye contact. And then he reaches for his seatbelt, cutting across his chest, and he literally holds on.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
‘GRAND DESIGNS,’ Edward suddenly yells out beside me. It makes me jump. He’s been so silent for the past hour, I almost thought he’d dozed off. But it’s clear he’s just been staring out of the window at the passing motorway.
‘What?’ I am baffled. ‘Did you just yell outGrand Designs?’
He turns to face me. ‘Sorry.’ He half smiles, looking a bit embarrassed. ‘It’s a family tradition. We used to play yellow car – you know, where you shout yellow car if you see a yellow car—’
‘I’m familiar,’ I tell him dryly.
He grins sheepishly again. ‘Well, that developed over time into a different car game. Every time you see some dilapidated old building that Kevin McCloud would get excited over, you shoutGrand Designs.’ He strains against the seatbelt, gesturing back the way we’ve just come. ‘Off the motorway there, we went past a rundown, neglected old water towerthat Kevin would love to see converted into a house for a couple and their three kids.’
This is the best thing I’ve ever heard. But almost better is how red Edward’s gone while explaining it.
‘I love a weird family tradition,’ I tell him, and try to think of any I can share. But of course, I have none. Beyond not ever getting any real affection or praise. Is that a cute story to tell, or no?
‘I’m sorry I missed such a beautiful building, so full of potential.’ I shake my head. ‘I’m sure Kevin would insist the new owners not change a single thing. They can’t move the huge storage tanks or the neighbouring reservoir, otherwise they might endanger theintegrityor thepoetryof the building.’ I’m using my best Kevin McCloud voice.
