I swallowed, forcing myself to focus on the fragile strands. I reached, clumsy, brushing past fading threads before catching one that pulsed faintly beneath my awareness. I felt Brenton’s attention on the threads with me, tracking every flicker.
Warmth sparked along my fingertips. The bird jerked in Zaicha’s palm, breath hitching before it steadied. Weak but present.
Air rushed from my lungs. Brenton exhaled with me, but his stance didn’t ease. His body remained angled between Zaicha and me, even as relief softened his features.
“You see?” she said. “You already know how to use it.”
I looked back at her, shaken. “You trusted me not to lose it.”
Her expression gentled, and I never questioned the distance her magic kept from mine. Only the way Brenton never quite relaxed beside me.
Chapter
Eighteen
FINLEY
Brenton’s smokecurled around the red pulses of death I released, and my heart kicked hard at the sight. But when the smoke twined with my threads unharmed, my chest loosened. His magic didn’t recoil. It played, slipping through mine like a dance partner.
I let him lead the first few steps before pulling them away, drawing the red threads around him and sending the smoke in a chase of my own. They circled, one darting after the other as they drifted higher.
For once, my magic wasn’t bound by destruction. It wasn’t demanded by duty or fear. It simply was.
The realization sent laughter spilling from me before I knew it. Light but startled, it echoed against the cliffs. I tilted my face into the sun, and for the first time in . . . perhaps ever, I felt free.
Brenton’s fingers threaded through mine. Together, we lifted our joined magic higher, a braid of smoke and red weaving through the sky. His heated palm against mine, my cheek against his shoulder. It all wrapped around me, making me feel like I was exactly where I belonged.
“This was another thing on my list of things I wanted to one day do,” I told him.
His head tipped, while his smoke lingered near mine. Not chasing but waiting. “What was?”
“A day, or morning, or even hour of fun.” My throat tightened. “Not just the kind of fun I’ve had with Etienne, but innocent fun. Where I don’t fear my magic or the responsibilities that come with it.”
The confession left me raw, so I sent my magic lower and pressed a kiss to the strong line of his throat. He groaned, the sound vibrating against my lips, and angled his head in invitation.
“There’s nothing innocent about what you do to me, Lolli.” It came out gritty, with the same need that filled us the previous night. His hands framed my face, his palms warm from the magic that still clung to him. “I want to give you everything you desire. Everything that’s on your list. I want to be the one who gets to experience each one with you.”
My stomach fluttered, something fragile forming inside me. “Yeah?”
“Everything.” He pressed his lips to mine, sealing his words with a kiss that was more promise than passion. Slow, torturous, and achingly sweet.
“I want that too,” I whispered against him.
Hand in hand, we sank onto the patch of grass. The world hushed around us except for the quiet pulse of our joined magic fading into the sky. Zaicha had left us hours ago. Rather than return to the dragon’s cave, I’d found peace with the way my magic had answered me. It hadn’t consumed but listened.
My fingers drifted across the blades of grass, brushing the tips as though the earth might reveal her secrets. Brenton settled beside me.
“Since I was little, I could feel this vibration from the land,” I admitted quietly, “like a tiny current in the grass or trees. I like telling myself it’s the earth’s heartbeat. Or her breath. I know it’s silly, but days when my magic had torn and ruined, feeling that kept me whole.”
“It’s not silly.” His voice rumbled beside me, firm with certainty.
He lay back, fingers trailing lazily across the grass. I followed him down, resting my head against his chest while I kept my hand pressed to the ground.
He tilted my chin, his hazel eyes open and unguarded. “Your magic is a marvel. You’re a marvel, Finley. I’m positive what you feel is exactly that. The earth lets you sense her. She wants you to.”
My throat tightened. “The way you see me,” I said, almost bitter at my own disbelief. A shaky laugh slipped out. “On the days I missed you the most, I’d ask the wind to carry a message to you. To let you know how much I missed you. How much I still needed you.” My eyes stung, hot with tears I couldn’t hold back. “We lost years together because of my choices.”
His arms tightened around me, pulling me closer until I felt his heart thump beneath mine. “But we have even more years ahead of us,” he said, kissing the top of my head. “We have an eternity in the afterlife. I died, you know. I’ve seen the afterlife myself.”
