“I’m not going anywhere,” I said, my voice rough with all the things I couldn’t say.Not until you tell me to.
I stretched out beside her, wrapping my arm around her waist while she drew her back close to my chest. In the quiet thatfollowed us, I held her the only way I knew how. As if she were my forever and I her everything.
She threaded her fingers with mine, and when she spoke, her words came softly. “This morning, before we left . . .” Her breath caught. “Etienne asked me to give you and me a try. He wants me to allow myself to love you and feel the way you love me.”
“Is that why you were crying?” I asked, hurting over her heartache, anger simmering over Etienne’s callous words.
“You have no right, Etienne. No right.”
“I have every right.”
“I was crying . . .” Her hold on me tightened, and I could scent the tears she tried to hold back. “You say I’m not a monster, but am I not? While a male I love was being brutalized, I went and fell for another male. What if my joy lies with you, and to be happy, I must be monstrous? You are filled with light, Brent. How selfish am I to want you, knowing my presence will darken yours?”
“If being monstrous is the price for your joy, then wear it like a crown.” For a beat, I couldn’t breathe. When I finally inhaled, it was as if I had truly never breathed before. My heart slammed against the confines of its cage. And hope, that same reckless hope flared stronger. It was hot and blinding, and I wanted to grasp it. Wanted to trust it, claim it. “If I am who you choose, then I will match your darkness, unflinching and unwavering.”
She turned slowly to face me. I cupped her face, forcing her to see the truth that burned inside me.
“But you are mistaken,” I said. “You don’t darken me. You never have. You are my light. The only light I’ve ever wanted to follow.” I paused, letting her take in my words while that infernal hope refused to lessen. “You said what Etienne wants for you, but what do you want for yourself?”
She placed her hand over my heart. “What I’ve always wanted.”
My eyes bounced over her, trying to take apart every expression that crossed her beautiful face. I swallowed hard.
“What is it you’ve always wanted?”
“You,” she said. “My squishy.”
Her reply, her calling meher squishy, should’ve made me laugh. Should’ve broken the tension wide open. I pulled in a breath.
She meant it.
I stared at her. At my fierce, battered mate, who’d repeatedly pushed me away but now looked at me like I was something safe. Something real.
“I—you have me, Lolli.” My voice broke. “All of me. I’m yours just as I’ve always been.”
While her lips didn’t stretch into a wide smile, the smile was there, living in her brilliant but tired eyes.
When her head found my chest with her hand still resting atop my heart, I let myself believe in forever. That she wouldn’t turn me away again. Not this time. And I pulled her even closer, just in case she forgot she wanted to stay.
Chapter
Eleven
FINLEY
I blinkedsleep from my eyes, taking in the morning light that spilled through the tent’s entrance. Before I drifted off to sleep with my head resting on Brenton’s chest, I thought the souls of all those I’d killed would follow me into my dreams. But there’d been nothing. Only the soothing beat of Brenton’s heart and his soft, even breaths. I’d drifted off listening to him, my own heart unclenching one breath at a time.
At some point during the night, either Brenton’s magic or my own had healed the blisters that had burned through my skin. I almost regretted it, wanting to feel Brenton’s gentle hands on me again while he tended to me.
Brenton still slept at my side with one arm clinging to my waist, his fingers curled against me as if even in sleep, he worried I’d leave. Again.
I wasn’t certain what to do with the calmness that settled in my chest. Or with that quiet shyness that prickled beneath my skin. But gods, I’d spent the night with Brenton. In his arms. After I’d told him I wanted him.
I still did. I always would.
Especially after he’d taken away the sharp edges of my despair with his gentle spirit and caring words.
“You aren’t monstrous, my love. You are a dragon. Burned, yet still standing.”
