We’d always gotten along well and it looked like that was still true. We spoke more about the girls and the school they’d be starting at, their hobbies, and my job at the gallery. He caught me up with what had been happening with all of his brothers and Charlotte, the one and only sister in the entire Westwood family.
Or at least, she had been when I’d known them, but it sounded like his brothers and cousins had had a few girls between them.Charlotte must be thrilled.
Eventually, I found myself asking the question I’d been dying to know the answer to for, well, longer than it had been since we’d seen each other again. “Are you seeing anyone?”
The second it left my mouth, however, I regretted it. I’d been wanting to know, but I hadn’t actually meant to ask him so bluntly. I wasn’t sure I had any right to. In fact, I was pretty sure I didn’t.
He looked genuinely surprised, those eyes widening a fraction. “Me?”
“Yes,” I replied, trying to keep it light. “You.”
“No. No, I’m not.” He paused for a beat, then became a little more guarded again. “Why?”
I shrugged, aiming for casual and probably landing nowhere near it. “It’s just, uh, you’reyou.”
He cocked a dark blond eyebrow at me. “Was that supposed to be an answer?”
“It was,” I said, but decided to drop it because he definitely looked uncomfortable now. “I didn’t mean to pry. I know it’s none of my business.”
“It kind of is,” he said after a moment, then cleared his throat. “I guess we both need to know if there are other people involved we need to be aware of. Are you? Seeing anyone, I mean.”
I laughed. I couldn’t help it. It just tore out of me. “No, I’m not.” As I admitted that, I finally found the courage to just say it. “I’m sorry about all of this. For everything that’s happening. I know you didn’t sign up for it and you don’t have to marry me.”
I held his gaze even though it would’ve been so much easier to look away. I meant it, though. And I wanted him to know that.
This entire situation was so wildly out of my control that I wouldn’t have much of a choice. If Zach said no, my grandfather would move onto someone else. Perhaps I would be able to run or to cut ties with them, but that just wasn’t me.
Zach didn’t deserve to be pulled into any of that.Hecould have a choice. I’d seen Douglas the other day. It looked like he’d gotten better with time, at least.
“I know things between us ended poorly,” I said. “You should know that I don’t expect anything from you. I understand you’re only considering this because you have to.”
There. I said it. It even sounded sensible.
Zach just stared at me for another second, then shook his head. “No.”
That was all he said. One word. Simple but firm.
“No?” I frowned. “No, what?”
“No,” he repeated. “That’s not why I’m considering it.”
I blinked so many times, my eyelids were going to need to soak in a hot tub after this, but I was so surprised that I couldn’t do anything else. “If that’s not it, then why?”
“We’ll get married,” he said, just like that, like he was confirming the time of a medium-important meeting. “It’s for the best.”
“The best for who, Zach? Because I’m certainly not convinced it’s best foryou.”
“It is,” he said firmly and confidently, but his voice was also quieter than usual. “I’m not mad at you, Adeline. I’m not holding grudges either. I used to. I’ll admit that, but…” He trailed off, swiping his tongue across his lips and closing his eyes like he couldn’t actually believe he was saying this, but then he looked at me again. “I understand now, Adeline. I understand why things had to end the way they did.”
Looking at him, I could see that he meant it, but I could also see his true feelings simmering right there beneath the surface. It darkened his eyes and injected tension into his shoulders and jaw, the old hurt. The betrayal. Maybe even the fear of it happening again.
My throat tightened in response and I almost told him that I wished we could turn back the clock. It had been sitting in the back of my mind since the moment I’d walked into that building.I wish I’d fought for you. I wish I’d chosen differently. That I would’ve been braver.
The words rose but failed to materialize. Especially when Jennifer came racing up to us, her voice ringing out across the noise of the dining room.
“Mommy!” She skidded to a stop beside the table, slightly out of breath and grinning as she pointed at Zach like he was a piece of equipment she wanted to borrow. “Can he come play with me?”
Zach recovered from the deeply emotional moment we’d been having at super speed, a smile spreading on his lips as he turned toward her. “Are you asking or telling me?”
