“I have always wanted to see it, ye ken,” she murmured. “And it isnae just because it would be beautiful, though I daresay it would be. But because it feels…” She paused, searching for the right words. “Because it feels like keeping faith with her.”
That made him look at her properly.
Ava kept looking ahead, suddenly aware that she had stepped somewhere far more personal than she intended when the walk began. Yet retreating now would only make it worse.
“She dreamed of it,” she said. “And I think some part of me has held onto the dream becauseshedid. Like letting it go would mean I had let go of more than some random bright thing in the sky.”
The path crunched softly beneath their shoes, and the wind rustled the grass.
She let out a quick, self-conscious sigh.“I ken. Saying it out loud… it sounds quite foolish, does it nae?”
“Nay,” Ciaran replied, his voice unwavering.
Ava looked at him then. His face was still composed, but his attention had changed. Sharpened, perhaps. Or deepened. She did not know how else to describe it other than to say that he was listening in a way that made her feel the words had weight once spoken.
“Ye see, me ma wasnae exactly the easiest person to relate with. She often got lost in her own world.”
“Really?”
“Aye. She had her own way of speaking about things,” Ava said more quietly. “She could make anything sound like the very best thing in the world.”
“And ye kept it,” Ciaran noted.
Ava looked up at him. “What?”
“Her enthusiasm,” he clarified, not breaking a beat. “It is clear from the way ye speak most times that ye share this feature with yer ma as well.”
Ava swallowed thickly and turned her eyes to the distant cluster of trees that stood just a hair away from the loch. “I have never really thought about it like that.”
“Daenae worry. I daenae think it will be easy for ye to let her go. Ye’re doing all of this for her, are ye nae?”
“For her,” she agreed. Then, after a beat, she exhaled. “And perhaps for meself as well.”
Ciaran did not respond, but the silence that followed was not the strained one from earlier. It felt different now and even more attentive. Ava felt it without needing to look at him again.
They continued walking side by side, the path stretching ahead, the grounds open and quiet around them. Ava became aware with growing certainty that the air had shifted without her noticing.
This was no longer merely about honoring her terms. She had come expecting controlled politeness and perhaps a little discomfort. Instead, she had told him something she had carried for years and found that he could listen to her without making fun of her.
Why had she even expected him to make fun of her in the first place? Was she that inexperienced when it came to companionship with a man? Or was she just treading the path based on Ciaran’s reputation? Was him being attentive worse or even better?
She could not yet decide which, and for a little while after, neither of them spoke.
Eventually, Ciaran turned to her, almost as if the thought had escaped him before he had fully decided whether to keep it.
“I have a telescope in me tower.”
Ava blinked.What?
She turned her head to him, wondering if her mind was playing tricks on her. He did not just say?—
“What did ye just say?”
Ciaran narrowed his eyes. “Did ye nae hear me?”
“Nay, I didnae.”
He brought his forearm to his chest, and Ava saw the faint outline of the bandage around his shoulder. “Something tells me ye did.”
