Not something. Someone.
Every other morning, I’ve woken up with Nix already up and moving. I’ve never known anyone who could bounce out of bed as easily as he does. The minute that alarm goes off, he’s up and running to the bathroom to start his day.
Maybe that’s what it’s like when you do something you’re passionate about. I can only hope that after my coaching business takes off, I’ll be the same way. Happy to jump out of bed in the morning to chase my passions. Work has never felt like that, so I’ll take anything that gets me closer.
With Nix’s blessing last night, I’m ready to jump in. Or at least wade in today. If I start the online coursework today, thenI’m one day closer to officially opening my doors and paying back the money I owe. That’s a big selling point. If I do my four-hour shift downstairs this afternoon with Nix, that still gives me most of the day to get going on the work.
For now, I’m content to lie in bed next to Nix. I still need to talk to him about my feelings. Originally, I planned to do it last night, but I chickened out. There’s not really a good way to start that conversation.Hey, so I think I might have discovered I’m bisexual thanks to you. Want to make out?Nope, not a great way to get started. I need something better. Much better.
Nix deserves everything in the world, which means I need something to woo him. The problem is that I’ve never wooed anyone before. Especially not another guy. What does that even look like?
Nix rolls over so he’s facing me.
The freckles on his face look a little darker than they did the last time I looked, no doubt a result of the summer sun. As a kid, people used to make fun of him for them, but they’re adorable. Between that and those little glasses he normally wears, he’s the perfect vision of a sexy geek.
A sexy geek who I’m hoping to make mine. Even if I have no idea how that will work. All I know is that I can’t keep holding myself back. It’s what I’ve done my whole life and how I ended up here in the first place. Maybe all that wouldn’t be so bad if it turned into something great.
Before I can stop myself, I reach out and brush the back of my hand along his cheek, moving a stray curl away. Nix’s skin is softer than I expected. Maybe because he doesn’t have all the stubble I do, even first thing in the morning. Is the rest of his skin equally soft?
That’s the kind of thought I shouldn’t be having first thing in the morning. My morning wood takes an immediate interest inthe idea of exploring Nix’s body, going from half-hard to ready to go in seconds.
The bed dips as Nick chooses this moment to join us, hopping up with a soft cry. “Shhh,” I hiss at him, not wanting to wake Nix.
It doesn’t work. Nix’s eyes flutter open. It takes him a second to take in the situation before he practically leaps off the pillow.
“Crap. What time is it?” He rubs his face a little, though it does nothing for the pillow mark running across his forehead.
“Six-thirty,” I reply, keeping my voice low.
“So much for sleeping in.” He turns and spots Nick making biscuits at the foot of the bed. “Oh, I see.” He turns back to me and rolls his eyes. I’m about to say something about how that cat is a criminal mastermind when Nix’s cheeks turn bright red. “Um, I guess I should get up then.”
He practically falls off the bed, his feet tangled in the sheet.
Oh, fuck. It’s then that I remember that I’ve kicked all the blankets off my side, leaving me sitting here in my gray briefs, with a massive erection.
Maybe he didn’t notice? No, of course he did. That’s why he’s currently hopping through the living room, getting away from me as fast as he can on the one day he’s supposed to get to sleep in.
So much for being a good roommate. Or even a good friend.
Grabbing the comforter, I pull it up to my armpits, covering every bit of skin that I can. “Sorry,” I mumble, even though he can’t hear me from this far away.
Is there a protocol in these situations? If there is, I’m not aware of it. Do I bring it up? Maybe explain to him that I’ve been developing feelings for him?
Nope, that’s not the romantic gesture I want to make. I might not know how to go about navigating my first same-sex relationship, but I know that’s not it.
The other option is to ignore it. Pretend the whole thing never happened. Sure, there’ll be a few moments of awkwardness, but those are bound to fade. At least I hope they are. This is my first foray into this arena, so I’m not so sure that’s the case. Especially with the unnatural shade of purple that Nix turned.
“I’ll be down at the shop,” Nix says, not bothering to look in my general direction. His curls are still dripping from his ridiculously quick shower.
“Not going to use your morning to relax?”
“Oh, um, no. I mean, there’s so much to do. Books don’t put themselves on the shelves.”
“No, I do that.” It’s pretty much the only thing I’m good at. That and taking payments from customers, though that one is a bit hit or miss.
“What?”
“Nothing.” I really need to talk to Nix about my feelings. This is getting out of hand, and neither of us is going to be able to continue down this path much longer. My feelings are about to burst out of my chest. If I don’t say something to him in a controlled fashion, I fear I’ll blurt it out in front of a customer.
