“I am not okay up there,” I squeaked out under my breath, the admission making my voice crack.
“Love…” he whispered apologetically, not removing his focus from me.
“And I know you're not either, or anyone else for that matter. I just—” Skin peeled from my cheek as I chewed the inside of it.“I feel like I don't know who I am anymore. I keep making dumb, rash decisions and hurting people and myself in the process.” My hair fell in my face as I shook my head slightly. “I have so many regrets in the past week alone and?—”
Sebastian held a finger to my lips. “We all do. Hell, half of the things I’ve done I regret. But not you. Never you. What happened between us is just a part of our story. A part that makes us, us. Something we will laugh about some day. Something we will tell our kids about.”
A cheesy smile crept its way onto my face. “Kids? You want kids?”
“Of course. Don’t you?”
“Yeah, I do. But we better get all of this shit with Beaumont squared away first. I can’t bring a baby into this mess.” I wouldn’t.
He let out a snort. “Maeve, you're twenty-two. We have plenty of time. I don't mean now.”
“I have time, but you have quite a few years on me,” I replied with a taunting smirk.
“Ah, yes. Twenty-six, the cut off for reproduction.” He chuckled sarcastically. “In all seriousness, I’m having plenty of fun trying, but I agree. It would be horrible timing.” He raised an eyebrow. “You take the pregnancy suppressant, right?”
“No? Should I be?”
Sebastian’s eyes practically fell out of his skull. “We just…I just…More than once?—”
I burst out laughing. “I’m joking. Yes. Of course I take it.”
He blew out a heavy breath of relief. “Not funny,” he growled, then in one swift motion he had me on my hands and knees. “You’re going to pay for that.”
Winking over my shoulder at him as he fisted my hair, I taunted him with my words. “Good.”
Chapter
Thirty
“Where the hell have you been?” Pia arched an eyebrow at me as I entered the common room. She sat around a table with Delani, playing a game that just looked like an excuse to drink, though there was only one bottle.
I slumped onto the sofa. “What do you mean?”
“I’ve barely seen you in days,” she pointed out, dumping her hand of cards on the table.
“Me either,” Delani added, taking a sip of her drink.
“I’ve been busy.” I shrugged.
After being stopped in the hallway, Sebastian entered the room, his hands in his pockets and a cocky grin that gave away exactly where I’d been the past few days.
“Ohhh,” Delani drawled. “Never mind.”
“I’m assuming by the smug look on that asshole's face that you guys are back together?” Pia raised the question, waving a finger in Sebastian’s general direction.
“I…Um…We—” I stuttered, shooting Sebastian ahelp me out here,look.
He swiped an empty glass from the bar cart near the fireplace, pouring himself a shot of whiskey. “She has beenreallybusy,” he took a sip, “incredibly busy, actually. Lots of training and stretching. Do you guys have any idea how flexible Maeve is?”
If I had a drink, I would have spit it out in shock.
Delani’s entire face turned sour. “Thanks for that image.”
“Okay, so back together or just screwing each other?” Pia asked for clarification. One of the things I loved about her was her blunt honesty, but seeing as Sawyer walked in the second the question left her lips, I cursed her under my breath.
