“I’m not doing anything until you get us what we need,” Marcus seethed.
“This is unfair. I don’t belong here, Marcus. You need to let me go!” Thaddeus begged. “Please, send me back to the afterlife! It’s torture being stuck here when my soul should be somewhere else!”
“I’m in control here. Youhaveto do what I tell you, otherwise, I’ll never set you free!” Marcus shouted. “Nowgo!”
A rush of cold wind chilled my skin, and the heavy presence in the room lifted from my shoulders as Thaddeus vanished.
“That was cruel, Marcus!” Ava’s rage flared across our bond as her voice grew louder. “He’s pleading with you to go back, and you’re making him stay here? You’re better than this.”
“Thaddeus isdead. There’s nothing more we can do for him, and using him to find out information can prevent the deaths of others, including ourselves!” Marcus snapped. “Do you want to end up like him?”
Marcus realized his horrible choice of words and inhaled a gasp to take it back, but Ava was already blowing up.
“You have no fucking idea what I’ve been through, what you’re puttingThaddeusthrough,” Ava seethed. “Do you understand what it’s like to be torn out of such a wonderful place like the Ancestral Lands and forced back here, into this agonizing existence? My mind’s half gone, because something doesn’t feel right with me. I don’t regret the choice I made to come back, but I sure as hell feel the effects every day of what it’s like to have one foot in the grave and the other here on this earth. And I’mstill alive.Thad is gone, and his ghost is confused, wondering why the hell he’s still stuck here when he should be at peace in the afterlife!”
I’d forgiven myself for the guilt I felt over bringing Ava back, but I couldn’t help but feel sympathy for my wife as her words bled out of her and over all of us. Shewasconfused, and I knew some of her memory struggles were due to her spinal injury, but it was more than that. She’d seen things the rest of us hadn’t, and gained an understanding of death we couldn’t grasp, because she wasn’t able to put it into words. Being gone had given her a sense of satisfaction none of us had ever felt, and that peace had been ripped away from her when she’d decided to return. It was terrible that Marcus was forcing Thaddeus into such an existence against his will.
“He’s useful to us. Until his usefulness runs out, he stays,” Marcus growled.
“Okay,Doctor Taurus,” Ava sneered back.
“You wanna compare me to the Warden? You want to win, we’re gonna have to become just like him, because I’m sick of trying to be the nice guy,” Marcus spat. “Thad can get into places we can’t, and get us information that’s out of our reach. If we’ve got any chance at all of saving Eddie, or getting our asses out of here, he’s our only option.”
“So you’re going to use his soul to get us what we need,” Ava replied shortly. “I didn’t think you were like that.”
Marcus gave a mean laugh. “You’ve used people too, Ava. Sorry this one wasn’t your idea.”
Ava whispered, “Fuck you, Marcus.”
“Break it up.” Kallie’s loud steps echoed through the chamber as she came between them. “This isn’t going to help.”
“Marcus needs to let Thaddeus go,” Ava insisted. “This iswrong.”
Marcus’ words were cold as he replied, “Well, you don’t have the ability to stop me. I’m the only one here who has power over death magic, and nobody can prevent me from controlling Thaddeus. So protest all you want, Ava. I’m not going to quit until this gets us somewhere.”
I was horrified at Marcus’ words. On one hand, I sided with Ava. I knew acclimating back to life here after her experience in the Ancestral Lands had been far from easy, and she was still suffering for it. What Thaddeus was going through was even worse.
On the other hand… Marcus was right when he said Thaddeus was our only option. Life at the Institute got more dangerous every day, and the Warden was closing in. I felt sorry for Thad, and knew it was awful we were putting him up to this.
But what other way was there? We had to sacrifice Thad’s peace in order to protect others.
Even if it tasted bitter going down. I for one couldn’t wait for when we finally had the information we needed, because none of us should be fighting like this.
Marcus bitterly left the room, and Kallie rushed after him. Oberi’s tone was hesitant.
I am concerned about Thaddeus, Oberi worried.As a mutabeecha, I can communicate with ghosts. I must find Thaddeus’ spirit and speak with him, in order to help ease the effects of being torn between the two realms.
“If it helps,” I said. I wasn’t sure what else we could do.
Oberi hurried off. Ava held it in on the way back to our cell, but once we got there, she nearly broke into tears.
“I can’t believe he’d do something so cruel. This isn’t Marcus!” Ava protested.
“Maybe not before,” I pointed out. “But we’re all getting darker now. He has a point, pidge. The Warden’s ruthless. We might have to be just as terrible as he is in order to beat him.”
“Irefuseto believe that. He’s just being a stubborn asshole.”
We kept tissues on the counter. I handed one to her, and she mumbled, “I’m not gonna forgive him for this.”
