Then I knew. I wasn’t angry at my body for feeling this way.
No. I wasgrieving.For Lady Magdalina, for Dolinska… but most of all, for the person I had been. For that once noble queen was dead, and there was no bringing her back. Gabby might as well have killed me. It would’ve been more merciful than this fate.
“It’s not your fault,” Delmare said. She went to lay a hand on my shoulder, before she drew it away.
“But it is. I’m the reason this happened,” I said miserably.
“We’re all upset about Dolinska, but being sad over it won’t change the fact that it’s gone now,” Delmare insisted. “We can rebuild it after we defeat Droga.”
I gave a skeptical noise. “You’re acting like it’s a sure thing.”
“One more Crystal left to find. That’s what we promised,” Delmare reminded me. “We can’t lose faith now.”
I forced my feelings to shut off. The more upset I got, the worse the pain became. It was easier to keep myself flat and emotionless, otherwise, the pain would become so white-hot and blinding that I’d lose my mind.
“You’re right.” I gave a deep sigh. “I hope she can forgive me. I sure as hell can’t.”
“She’ll apologize once she gets her feelings out. That footage wasn’t… easy for any of us to watch.” Delmare’s voice was heavy.
Kiara didn’t say a thing. I think she’d followed Odette in here because she knew what was going to happen, and wanted to run interference, though her words had died against Odette’s anger.
“Did you find out what happened to Siona?” I asked. We hadn’t been able to locate Kiara’s sister since the collapse of Dolinska, and I was worried about her.
“I actually got in contact with my parents. She was one of the few people who made it out. She’s living with them in the griffin village, but her store is gone. She lost everything,” Kiara said sadly.
Enchanting Whispershad been one of my favorite stores in Dolinska. I knew the shop had been Siona’s life. “I’m so sorry.”
“She survived. She knows she’s lucky for that alone.”
Kiara nibbled on her lip. “I should find Odette. She needs someone to talk to right now.”
Kiara dipped out. Delmare dropped a hand to her pregnant belly and rubbed the top of it.
“Not long now,” I told her as she took a seat across from me.
“No.” Delmare stared out the window. “I wish it wasn’t so soon. We need more time. This world isn’t safe for my child.”
“I don’t think it ever was safe, for any child,” I stated. “But the estate is protected. Droga hasn’t found us yet, and he would’ve by now if he had any idea where we’d gone. As long as your baby stays here, they’ll be okay.”
Delmare nodded. “That’s what I’m counting on.”
The door swung open again. I cringed, thinking it was Odette coming back to give me another piece of her mind, but it was only my grandparents, accompanied by my brother and Lord Lucien.
“Would the lot of you mind keeping it down?” Babcia said crossly. “This is a home, not a boxing ring.”
“Sorry,” I said sheepishly. My brother took a seat across from me, and I asked, “How’s Vara?”
“Much better, now that she’s got some food and medicine in her. She should be fine in a few days,” Arthur told me.
That was a huge relief. Puck the dog wandered in, laying his head on my lap. I gave him a few pats on the head before he laid down at my feet.
Bapa was carrying a tray. He sat it on the coffee table in front of me and said, “Thought some tea might help your stomach.”
“Thank you.” I sat forward, and took a cup and a saucer. Bapa poured me some tea, and I set it aside to let the leaves stew.
Lucien gave me a smile. “It’s nice to see that you’re up and around.”
“In a way.” I hadn’t left my room in days. I knew my father was worried about me.
