Oh myancestors, THAT’S why Chancey had offered to have a threesome! He was trying to warm me up to this whole poly-thing!
Wow. I couldn’t believe I’d been so stupid. And I’d turned him down. I bet that had just crushed Charlie’s poor feelings. He wanted to break it to me easy.Ancestors, that Charlie couldn’t tell me the truth about his sexuality twisted up all my feelings and made me sad. I had to be the problem.
I must be a bad girlfriend— or bad partner, since I’m not a girlfriend, or whatever the fuck we are. Is this my fault, because I told him I didn’t want to date? Is Chancey a better kisser than me? I should ask. I wonder which of them are bigger.
Too bad I couldn’t talk telepathically to Oberi yet. I bet she had the dirt.
My thoughts were so jumbled about Charlie and Chancey, I almost walked into the door when I got to the Alchemy classroom. I sat down at my desk and tried to clear my thoughts. I didn’t have a potions class this semester, but I had a class with Hemlock, and this was her designated room. Supernatural Explorations sounded interesting, and Hemlock was my favorite teacher, so I was planning on this being my best class this semester.
As people continued to flood the room, my nerves got worse.Ancestors, can’t there be fewer people in this class? The number of students closing in around me felt suffocating. I began scratching my arms through the fabric of my sweater, feeling like my skin was crawling.
Things were getting bad again. I barely remembered last week. I was bored all the time and couldn’t pay attention to a lecture for more than five minutes. My perfect grade point average had plummeted at the start of the semester, because I couldn’t be bothered to finish my homework or tests. Nothing interested me like it had before.
Maybe I needed my meds adjusted. But I was scared to do that. The last time I’d adjusted my lithium, I’d gone into a full-on black hole of depression and hadn’t left my bed in six days. I’d nearly starved to death. I didn’t want that to happen again.
Opal sat beside me, and I nearly shied away from her presence. “Hi, Ava,” she said. “Did you get the homework done last night?”
“Didn’t bother.” I’d have nothing to turn in to Hemlock.
“Oh.” She frowned. “I was kind of hoping I could copy off you, since there were a few answers I didn’t understand—”
“Give it here.” I snatched the paper out of her hands, then wrote down the answers she’d missed quickly before handing it back to her.
Her eyes widened. “I didn’t ask you to do that. You didn’t even do your own homework. You shouldn’t be worrying about my grade.”
“It’s fine, Opal. Just take it.”
Her look was reluctant. “Okay…”
She fidgeted as she took out her pencils and laid them out precisely. “I got a few laps in at the pool this morning. There’s a tear in my mermaid tail, but I don’t know where it came from. I think Melody has scale rot, though. She was telling me her scales were falling off in the locker room this morning…”
Opal talked on and on. I didn’t have much to offer in the way of conversation, but she kept chatting like it was any other day.
That was the best thing about Opal. No matter how bad my symptoms got, Opal never treated me any different. She hung out and had conversations with me whether I was completely sane or three sheets to the wind. It was nice.
Hemlock walked in, and the conversation in the room died away. “I hope all of you finished the worksheet I handed out,” she began. “Otherwise, there will be severe consequences for your grade.”
Whoopee. Like I cared.
Hemlock tapped on the top of her chest, just beneath her chin. As she did so, a light began to glow underneath her skin. It was round and radiant, a tiny purple ball that resonated within her body. The class awed at the prettiness of her fae light.
“As many of you know, this class is about exploring unusual aspects of the supernatural world,” Hemlock said. “It’s a bit of an odds and ends catchall for things that aren’t expansive enough to elaborate on in full classes, but are interesting enough nonetheless. There are many things supernaturals share across the board. Certain powers of magic are available to everyone, though they’re typically so minor, they go ignored in the magical community. Intuition is one of those abilities.”
Hemlock gestured to the ball of light that shone under her skin. “You don’t need toseeyour intuition to know it’s there, but I’ve created an illusion to show you an example of the magic that lies inside. Each of us has a small light within us, guiding us toward what we believe is right. This is called our sense of intuition. Usually, it shines the same color as your aura— a different lesson for another time. Intuition can be used for many things. It can help us make a choice when we aren’t sure which path to take, or warn us of danger before we even know it’s there. Our intuition comes from our highest selves, the part of us that resonates within our deepest souls. It connects us with our true purpose and guides us onward toward it, whether it be right or wrong, but can be used for other means. For example, magical explorers would use their intuition in order to locate artifacts and search ruins.”
That was interesting. My Grandpa Elliot often said he “had a hunch” whenever we were exploring caves together, and we’d follow his suspicions wherever they led. Daddy complained that my grandfather didn’t know what he was doing, but maybe there was something more magical to his process that we didn’t understand. Grandpa’s weird hunches had led us to find some interesting discoveries when we’d gone exploring quite a few times— whenever they didn’t lead us into booby traps or dead ends, as Grandpa was likely to do.
Ghost raised his hand— he was a warlock student who was in this class with me, who’d gotten his nickname because he was scared of everything. “How does it work, if it’s an innate skill?”
“It’s quite simple,” Hemlock replied. “To follow your intuition, you must look inside. The more you practice using it, the more effective it will be. You must learn to trust yourself, and cast away doubt. The most talented supernaturals are always the ones who can follow their instincts with trust and faith. If you ignore your intuition, it will cease to appear, and may even fade over time. However, if you practice using it in even the simplest situations, it will show up for you when you need it the most.”
Hemlock levitated the ball of light outside of her body and sent it outward. It began flying around the room, and she followed it in a circle. “You can practice amplifying the power of your intuition by being creative, such as through dance or art, or through meditation. Keeping a journal on your instincts will also prove helpful, and show you a record of where your intuition was right and where you might’ve gone wrong. The gods gave supernaturals the power of intuition so that we might use it, not let it sit idly by. Sometimes, they know what’s best for us.”
Hemlock continued on, but as much as I tried to listen, her words fell away. I tried to take notes, but they turned into doodles as her voice droned on in the background, and my eyes went glossy. Fuck, this was a subject I wasinterestedin, and I couldn’t pay attention. I hoped it didn’t look to Hemlock like I was spacing out. Iwantedto learn this. Why couldn’t my brain just work right?
“Miss Mitoh? Miss Mitoh, you’ve been sitting there for ten minutes.”
I blinked a few times. “Huh?”
