Charlie rolled over and opened a drawer that was attached to the side table beside the bed. “I guess that means we can’t do anything. We don’t even have— fuck all, I don’t believe this.”
Charlie pulled a condom out of the drawer. I giggled. “Looks like the servants wanted to make sure we were well-stocked.”
He got really quiet. “Ava, are yousure?”
“Yeah,” I said nervously. “I’m certain this is the right moment.”
“Well… okay.” Charlie put the condom on.
My mouth went dry, and my body felt paralyzed as I watched him do it. He boosted himself over me, and I squeezed my eyes shut. I tried to take deep breaths as I felt Charlie’s weight press down on me from overhead. I ran my hands over his back and tried to remind myself over and over that this wasCharlie,and nothim, but it was hard to do. I could still remember what that bastard had left inside of me, and the memory of it was enough to make me sick.
Nothing had happened yet, but this already felt like too much. Charlie came to a pause. “Ava, you’re tense. I can sense you’re scared.”
“I’m fine,” I insisted. Ancestors, I fucking wanted this! He just needed to get it over with.
“You’re not ready, and I’m not ready, either. I’m not comfortable pushing you that far.”
Charlie pulled away. My body relaxed and wept with lust at the same damn time.
Disappointment seeped into every inch of me, pinning me to the bed. “I feel like a failure.”
“You’re not. We’ll do something else.” I heard a snapping sound as Charlie took off the condom and threw it across the room.
He certainly didn’t seem bothered, but I was. Charlie began kissing my breasts, but I couldn’t concentrate. After I failed to respond, he set his chin on my chest and said, “You’re scowling, pidge.”
“How can you tell? You can’t see me!”
“Because Iknowyou.” Charlie propped himself up on a pillow. “What’s this really about?”
“I can’t have heirs if you can’t put your dick in me,” I grumbled. I was already feeling the pressure, and Eddie had just told me about all this shit a few hours ago.
“Are you serious?” Charlie’s mouth dropped open. “I’m not even sure if Iwantkids.”
“It doesn’t matter. You’re expected to have a child, to carry on the Elven monarchy,” I said.
“I don’t have todoanything,” Charlie said. “As far as I’m concerned, they lost any right to an heir once they left me to fend for myself. If this is the life I choose, so be it, but I’m not convinced this is the right choice for me yet. And it’s definitely too soon to know if this is the right path for you.”
“If this is our life, I want to start living it,” I said. “I don’t want to wait.”
“Why do you always have to be so impatient?” Charlie began to rub my thigh. “There’s no rush.”
“I don’t see any point in procrastinating the inevitable.”
“I do,” Charlie said. “I want to enjoy every moment with you that I can get. I don’t want our relationship to be riddled with responsibility.”
“But it already is,” I insisted. “The prophecy—”
Charlie shushed me, and I fell quiet. “None of that matters,” he said. “All that matters is us.”
My lip wobbled. “What if we never…?”
“It’ll be okay. One day we’ll get that far,” he said. His gentle fingers roamed my skin. The movements were soft, like he was playing the piano he loved.
Charlie slowly moved down my body. I savored the feelings as his lips caressed my center and immediately made me boneless. He kissed and tasted me until I was calling out his name, my hands fisted in his black locks to drive him onward. In a mad craze, I grabbed him and threw him on his back, splaying a hand on his chest as I went down on him. I took his length down in one motion, and he hissed with delight. The noises he made drove me crazy as I lathered pleasure on all the right places.
Sucking his dick was one of the great pleasures of my life. I had to admit it— I loved giving him oral. I don’t know what was so thrilling about it, except that I knew it gave him ecstasy unlike any drug on this planet, and that turned me on. I didn’t lift my mouth from his cock when he came, preferring to take it all down like his come was the elixir of my existence. I felt his orgasm explode through our bond, and it was so powerful, it nearly made me dizzy.
I wanted to make him feel like this every day for the rest of his life. I wasn’t sure if I was trying to make up for what he’d never had, or just promising him he’d have a better future, but regardless, I just wanted to promise him as much love as possible. I needed to give him so much love that he thought he’d might drown in it, and even then, I don’t think it would be enough to express the complex feelings I had that were radiating in my heart. I could cut myself open and spill it all out for him, but it wouldn’t be enough to explain it, because I couldn’t make sense of it myself. Charlie justwas, and his existence was enough to make me want to live for him.
