She opens the door and steps inside. “Yes, now,” she insists as she shuts the door behind her.
I cover my face with a pillow. Everything with Gage is too raw. I don’t want to discuss it.
Mom sits on the bed and tugs the pillow away. “We need to talk.”
“I’ve had enough talking for one day.”
“Then, you can listen.”
I harrumph before rolling to my side and giving her my back. “I’m not in the mood, Mom.”
“Too bad. This conversation is long overdue.”
When she pauses, I pray she gives up and leaves. Too bad I’ve never been a lucky person.
“I screwed up.”
She has my attention now.
“I never should have relied on you the way I do.”
I sigh before turning to face her. “I don’t mind, Mom. I’m happy to help out with the kids. They’re my siblings. I love them.”
“You’ve been such a big help. I wouldn’t have made it through the past years without you.”
“Yes, you would.”
“No, Addy, I wouldn’t have.” She blows out a breath. “When your dad left, I lost it. I’m not proud of how I acted. Running around, drinking, and carousing with various men. Getting pregnant three different times by practical strangers. I left you to raise yourself and then your siblings.”
“Those times are over.”
She wrings her hands. “Only because Mila fell off the swing when she was two.”
What a horrible day that was. I rushed Mila to the hospital after she lost consciousness but the doctor refused to give me any updates on her condition. I was her sister, not her mom.
But I couldn’t find Mom. I called and called and called. Finally, Weston – a cop I knew from school – arrived with Mom, who was drunk and slurring her words.
Mom got her shit together after that day. She stopped drinking and partying. She didn’t bring any strange men home anymore. She found a steady job.
I pat Mom’s thigh. “You’re a good mom.”
“Now.”
I don’t have a response. She’s right. She wasn’t a great mom to me when I was growing up. I did everything I could to cushion Otis and Penelope from the reality of our lives until Mom got her shit together.
Mom straightens her back. “It’s time for me to be a good mom to you.”
“What do you mean?”
“You should leave.”
“Leave? I can’t leave. Mila turned nine today but she still needs adult supervision. And someone has to be around to stop Penelope from taking over the world. And drive Otis to his football games.”
She lifts her chin. “I’m their mom. I will do those things.”
“But how? You barely earn enough money to pay for this house as it is. If you cut down your hours to watch after the kids, there won’t be enough money.”
“I’ll figure it out. This isn’t your fight. It’s mine.”
