He met my gaze. “Yes?”
“Would you…?”Just go for it. “Would you like some pup time?”
His eyes widened and his mouth dropped open.
Shit. Absolutely the wrong thing to say. Damn it.Just because I’d been obsessing over it since I’d seen his pin yesterday, it didn’t mean I had the right to suggest it now.
He closed his eyes and let out a little sigh. “Would that be okay?”
“Of course.” I held myself still. “What does that look like for you?”
“I, uh…” He rubbed his face. “I don’t know. I haven’t…that is I don’t much…” More rubbing his face. “I’m so confused.”
Which put the ball squarely in my court.
“You have options, so why don’t I make a few suggestions and if anything feels right, you can let me know?”
He nodded vigorously.
“So there’s playtime. I, uh, have toys you can play with. Rope, balls,stuffies—”
“Stuffies?” His eyes lit. “Really?”
My heart squeezed.Please forgive me, Marty.Well, I wasn’t apologizing entirely. Marty had always made it clear he wanted me to find another pup. Even better would be another lover and eventually husband. I’d told him he was ridiculous—all the while knowing if the shoe was on the other foot, I would’ve been making the same damn request. “If it wouldn’t be too weird—” I offered a smile. “I’ve kept some of Marty’s things. He was my pup—”
“I know.” Andre stepped toward me. Slowly, he took my hand. “I don’t think I can ask this of you.”
“You’re not asking—I’m offering.” Gently, I ran my hand down his cheek. “This comes with zero obligations. If you just want to cuddle with stuffies, that’s fine. If you want to dress up, I’ve got outfits. Scritches are liberally available—upon request. Playing is encouraged, but not required. This is whatever will make you feel better.”
“Just like that?”
I squinted, looking upward. Then I met Andre’s gaze and squeezed his hand. “I’ve never believed in fate—despite the fact Marty and I were so damn compatible and we hadn’t even known we were into puppy play when we’d gotten together. But for some reason you and I were standing next to each other at the counter. Something about you spoke to me. And I saw your pin—” Again, I caressed his cheek. “But all this is up to you, Andre. I think I’ve been clear where I stand. I loved being Marty’s handler, and I didn’t believe I’d ever meet someone else who would call to me in that way again.”
“Ever is a long time.”
This time, I offered a small smile. “I did consider going to Club Kink on Pup Night. That just…felt too overwhelming, you know?”
“Yeah, I get that. I’ve never—” He swallowed. “Buying that pin is the closest I’ve ever come to doing anything about it, you know?”
Again, my heart squeezed. “Do you have a pup name?”
Slowly he nodded. His gaze traveled away from me, into the living room to where Daphne lay snoozing, and then back to me. “Solo.”
“Okay.”How the hell am I supposed to interpret that?
“Because, you know, like Han Solo. And how he didn’t really have any friends, you know? Well, except Chewbacca. But, like, he sees it as it’s him against the world. That’s—” He swallowed. “—that’s how I feel most of the time. And since no one knows, and no one’s ever asked, it seemed like a good pup name.”
“If it speaks to you, then it’s a good pup name.”Even if it makes me a little sad.“Now, what’s your pleasure? Play, cuddles, scritches, stuffies, or all of the above? Or none, if there’s—” I cut myself off at his frantic nodding. So I smiled. “Would you like to see the playroom?”
His eyes widened. “You have a playroom?”
I grinned. “We kitted out the space—padded floors, colorful walls…just everything a puppy could want.” I squeezed his hand. “Let’s head there now. Oh, you might want to go to the bathroom first.”
He bit his lower lip. “That would be best. You’re the best.” He headed toward the powder room.
Maybe you should heed your own advice. God, am I doing the right thing?Since I didn’t actually believe, I wasn’t anticipating a response.
Before I could debate further, Andre returned.
